A Cheap Trim

Closed for Renovations*

2009-08-11T17:13:00.002+10:00

I shall return, this blog will be reintroduced after a few minor changes and maybe a shift in the roster.
Peace kids.

Take Control

2009-06-16T16:15:00.001+10:00

If you're not down with CTRL.ALT.SHIFT, what are you reading instead?
CTRL.ALT.SHIFT is a UK-based experimental youth initiative which aims to combat disengagement with global issues amongst young people. It is a community for passionate and outspoken individuals who are joined in the fight against injustice and poverty (Wikipedia).
Basically, it's The Youth Of Today giving the inside scoop on the important issues (i'm nearly too old to call myself a youth any more, I dunno if 25 year olds count as part of The Youth Of Today. Maybe i'm the Youth of Yesterday).
Sweet layout to the site, and mad interesting articles from young guns all over the world make for a highly interesting read all round.
I'd highly recommend the current piece on corrective rape in Africa (I never thought the words corrective rape would come up on this blog). I won't lie, the articles pretty heavy, but well worth the read.
Get involved kids.
Peace y'all...

Making a point......

2009-06-15T17:53:00.015+10:00

I've been slack on my gig attendance lately. I used to go to heaps of gigs, but i've only been to one or two this year, and they weren't really standouts so i've backed off from the party rocking lately. I did go to Necro, but I don't really remember it, so it doesn't count. I mean, I was in attendance, but there's no way I could tell you how it was. Damn, that was a good friday night though.
Anyway, the reason I bring this up is firstly because next week i'm out to see Dennis Coles aka Tony Starks aka The Ironman aka Sun God aka GHOSTFACE KILLAH, so i'm getting hyped to head out for that.
Secondly, i've been having a discussion with my buddy Jacko about the defining hip hop move, the point. There is no better way to signify, or to garner more crowd response than The Point.
For all you slow mother funkers, let me break it down.
Firstly, if you are a hip hop artist, there is very little you can do on stage, as DJing doesn't really lend itself to Jagger-esque stage moves (although i'd love to see Qbert rocking the naughty schoolboy at his next gig), and if you're a true MC you're much to involved in spitting with the quickness to be leaping all over the stage. That type of shit will leave you out of breath.
So what can a Nilla do to get noticed? You're left with the tried and true option for punctuating your dope verses, The Point.
Here is Ant from Atmosphere highlighting the basic "Point to crowd to punctuate a dope punch line" move, a must for any burgeoning MC who wants people to take him seriously.
Thankyou Slug, nice finger placement and a good strong wrist, that'll have the white boys in the front row nodding in agreement in no time.

Secondly, if you have an exceptionally long line, say the last 4 bars of your verse are one sentence, and you decide that they should be spat in one breath. The only way to highlight your exceptional lung capacity is MC stage move number 2, the "slowly raise hand while spitting and Point to sky on last bar" point.
Brother Ali highlights the importance of extending one finger to further solidify the fact you're pointing at the sky.

Now, these two moves should give you a good feel for basic MC stagecraft, but what if you're in the crowd I hear you ask... what then? Well, since everyone knows that if you are a white male, you have to be gay to dance. Seriously, you cannot be a straight white man, and be able to dance. Sorry, but it's true. So here's the perfect option for you, my 'nilla friend. Just fall back on the tried and true crowd move, The Agreement Point.
Firstly, if anyone (repeat ANYONE) is taking a photo in your general direction, you MUST point at the camera. There is no reason for you not to do this, it MUST be done, and done continually. This shows that you are in control of the situation, and you are in agreement with the photographer when it comes to the question of taking a photo of you.
Example:
Note the white boy front and centre who has decided a little late to do The Agreement Point to camera and has ended up looking a little au fait.

Secondly, the front row is the perfect option for a Point to stage to salute your favourite artist. Again, since I assume most of my audience is made up of white boys, we all know that any self repecting white hip hopper can't be showing too much emotion around other dudes, so instead of screaming like a 12 year old girl, you can just nod your head and give the Agreement Point to whichever artist is currently garnering your approval.
See below for an example of some excellent front row Point and Nod.
Note the single arm reaching out for Z-Trip, as well as the standard 1 finger Point on the far right of the photo.

But don't be too hasty to just throw a Point out willy nilly, if someone catches you in a sloppy Point and Nod you'll have to live with the shame forever.
Poor form buddy, this is a sloppy Point and Nod. You've got the whole thing ass backwards. You're basically poking yourself in the eye there bro. Lift your game.

So there you have it kids, a primer for those who don't know the appropriate way to show respect to a hip hop artist. And please, make sure you Point and Nod to your favourite artists as much as possible, as i've noticed that the Point and Nod is dying out and being replaced by its technological counterpart, the Iphone point.

Cool, but not as respectful.
Peace y'all.

Chillin' out, maxing.....

2009-06-10T22:03:00.003+10:00

...relaxing all cool.

Carradine, we hardly knew ye....

2009-06-08T21:12:00.004+10:00

So I was going to eulogise (word to the motherfucking thesaurus, bitches) David Carradine when i first heard that he had died, I figured a few Youtube clips of classic Carradine work and a link to his IMDB would do for the man.
Boy, was I wrong.
Now it appears the guy died in the closet of his Bangkok hotel room, possibly while engaging in a little auto erotic asphyxiation (insert INXS/Michael Hutchence gag here).
Now, I could be crass and make a bunch of "choking one off" style jokes, and there's a few in the reserve tank, so don't worry. If things get too serious, we can fall back on that classic vein of humour.
But I want to hit on a different issue for a moment, as i'm sure the breakfast radio shows have me covered for crass humour. I want to point out how rad this death is. Not the death itself, that's a tragic loss of a fantastic character actor. But let's be real, Carradine was old, and there's a lot worse ways to go than in a Bangkok hotel, apparently involved in a sex act, at 72 years of age.
For example, we may very soon be seeing this gravestone...

Again, no disrespect to Swayze, but it's not the best capper to an awesome life. However, something like this......

Is quite fitting in a way.
Carradine, we salute you.

The best of David Carradine (that I could find on Youtube)

David the Bullet Dodger.

...'cos he dodges bullets.

Carradine V Stallone

'nuff said.

Carradine on Superman

He's right, we are weak.

Enjoy kiddies.
Peace

Slow as a wet week....

2009-06-04T18:44:00.002+10:00

I know, i've been slack and shit this week. My head is still recovering from last friday, and i've been rewatching The Wire. Guaranteed to keep you distracted. But I promise the long weekend will be filled with cheap goodness.
In the meantime, here's the Reservoir Muppets to keep you entertained.

Peace.

Drunken Texting

2009-05-31T17:57:00.003+10:00

If i'm bored, i'll waste time on any number of websites, but one of my favourites is mydrunktexts.com
So in the spirit of that website, here's a sampling of my extremely drunken texts from friday night.
(Luckily, I was out of credit so none of my friends actually received these texts)

03:19am I might call my first album "Eskimo Breast Milk".
03:24am Blank message sent to Tasha' work phone number
03:30am Chilling out dr
(clearly I thought that was enough explanation anyone needed)
03:45am Send a fax like a boss....
(sent to 4 different people)
07:44am Spaced = Greatest comedown show ever.

This is why I don't ususally have credit.

Little green men and human lab rats

2009-05-28T17:21:00.007+10:00

There's been a story floating around for a while now, i first picked it up on Crikey but it's been reported in a few places since then about how a SF lawyer has filed suit against the CIA and the US Army on behalf of the Vietnam Veterans of America and six former American soldiers who claim they are survivors of classified government tests conducted at the Army's Edgewood Arsenal in Maryland . These tests, happening between between 1950 and 1975 involved all sorts of chemical mayhem, including but not limited to VX, tabun, soman, sarin, cyanide, LSD, PCP, and World War I-era blister agents like phosgene and mustard.
US Soldier before and after classified tests

This lawyer, Gordon Erspamer, alleges that almost 8000 soldiers were used as lab rats for these unhinged experinments after "Suddenly, they stopped using civilian subjects and said, 'Oh, we can get these military guys for free. The government could do whatever it wanted to them without liability."
Don't get me wrong, this type of shit is not kosher at all, and we here at the Trim in no way support this type of behaviour on anyones part, least of all government agents. There's no way they know how to throw a good party, what are they doing giving away LSD?
However, I want to focus in on one particular piece in this article, about the Vietnam veteran Frank Rochelle.
To summarise, Frank is 20, in the army, and sees a notice for the Edgewood program. it promises "relief from guard duty, the freedom to wear civilian clothes, three-day weekends, and, upon completion, and a medal of commendation". All he had to do was cop some chemicals. Dude signs the secrecy and liability papers, and then proceeds to catch 3 rounds of "nonlethal incapacitating agents like DHMP and glycolate, both of which act as sedatives that produce hallucinations".
Again, couldn't imagine a worse place to be than with government agents while really high. Possibly in jail, but that would be about it.
According to Erspamer's complaint, "Over the next two to three days, Frank was hallucinating and high: he thought he was three feet tall, saw animals on the walls, thought he was being pursued by a 6-foot-tall white rabbit, heard people calling his name, thought that all his freckles were bugs under his skin, and used a razor to try to cut these bugs out. No one from the clinical staff intervened on his behalf".

Now, i'll be honest. I'm no stranger to some of these chemicals myself. I've never touched any WW1 blistering agents, but to quote Jackson, i've had a visionary experience or two in my time. I've never thought my freckles were bugs, but apparently thats par for the course with ice addicts, and I can see how someone would eventually make a connection like that if they were mad high all the time.
Now, i'm betting that Frank was in no way expecting to feel like he was 3 feet tall, or to see a 6 foot tall white rabbit, and that's inherently where the problem is. If Frank had been fully informed prior to taking these crazy chemicals, he probably would have had a great trip. Instead, he ended up with something like this...
"Frank, meet Frank. He'll be stalking you for the next 72 hours..."

Now, if Frank had been allowed to chill in front of the TV with his buddies and watch Bee Movie (trust me, it's the bomb) he would have laughed his arse off and enjoyed the animals coming out of the wall. Instead, he was with some CIA Squaresville chumps, subjecting him to a battery of nasty tests, and ruining his high. who wants to be out of your skull, and have someone taking readings and questioning you? That type of shit would be scary enough if you were totally sober, so i'm not getting at Frank for cracking under the pressure, that can happen to the best of us, and probably would.
My point is simply that all "mind expanding" drugs are totally reliant on your surroundings to define what kind of trip you have, and a government testing facility is no place for a person to trip balls. It just isn't. I
The lesson here, the government still has no idea about why people take drugs, and also, you can't learn about Acid from tests.
Also, anything or anyone that has anything to do with the government will totally blow your high.
Peace

Elementary, my dear Watson.......

2009-05-24T22:20:00.002+10:00

I'll watch Robert Downey Jr. in pretty much anything, and this looks dope regardless.
Still 6 months away, but it'll be worth the wait.

More commentary....

2009-05-23T22:09:00.003+10:00

As a kid, I was never that interested in sport, and i'm still not. Well, I like Slamball, but there's just not enough network coverage to be a real fan. I just didn't really care, I can watch Football if others want to, but to quote Tony Martin i'm pretty much a sporting dyslexic. I can appreciate the gladiatorial nature of the activity, but I can't really discern between a good player and a bad player at all. All football looks pretty much like the same game being played over and over again.
However, I did kind of want to be a commentator. I loved (and still do) Roy and HG calling pretty much anything, and after many hours of listening to Get This, Rex Hunt is just too funny to hear.
A great commentary can lift sports above a boring show of strength, and a great commentator can be insightful, funny and poignant all at the same time.
Like this guy here.

Dennis Cometti is funny as hell, and pretty much an improv genius. He's been a commentator for almost 40 years, and i'm more than happy to watch a whole game of Football just in case there's some comedy gold slipped in there on the sly.
Here's a collection of some great Cometti improv.

"Scotty Cummings alone in the square, jumping up and down and waving his arms like they're playing My Sharona"

"A couple of big touches from Clive Waterhouse, who was battling up until about 5 minutes ago, in danger of becoming Clive Waterboy."

Dermott: And the ball spills free to Kickett...
Cometti: Troy Cook you mean?
Dermott: Yes.. well, they do look rather alike.
Cometti: How so Dermott?
Dermott: (realising that sounded rather racist.) Umm, well, they are both..er..
Cometti: .. Midfielders, yes Dermott.

This one from Melb v Coll last year:
Healy: Word is this guy is the most reliable kick for goal in the side. They say down at Collingwood if you had to have someone kicking for your life, Tarkyn Lockyer would be the man
Commetti: I'd prefer my mum
(silence)
Commetti: Not a great footballer, but at least she'd care.

"Ashley McIntosh, like a good hair spray... capable of a subtle hold"

"Barlow to Bateman, the Hawks are attacking alphabetically"

"Carl Steinfort looking more like Robert Walls than Robert Walls"

"Bell bringing the ball out of the back line..... looking for wide runners..... passes to Walker... a contradiction in terms, really"

"The only change to the Eagles side is that Rowan Jones has had a haircut"

"Farmer may have an injury to his calf........ hmmm, a farmer with a calf problem."

Dennis: "Dear shoots... waiting on the goal umpire.... he's kicked a behind. A wry smile there from the goal umpire, certainly a sense of the dramatic."
Don Scott: "He's the danger man, Dennis."
Dennis: "Who? The goal umpire?"

"It's a goal! A dream start for Hawthorn. Spider had both his legs taken out from under him - leaving only the other six to balance on....."

"I love that surname Fixter. Sounds like something from a Batman movie -The Fixter? but I digress..."

Last night when Richmond kicked up the middle towards Ray Hall:"Richmond attack through the corridor, in this case the Hall."

Tony Liberatore had just gone into a pack as he is wont to do and come out with blood gushing from his eye: "Libba went into the pack optimistically and came out misty optically."

I think it was the Freo/Pies game last week and Dennis, after describing the second of 2 easy dropped marks says, "the Tale of Two Sitters".

When Mark went up for a mark: "... and the Mercuri is rising..."

Dermie: "Why do you suppose he went side on to take the mark?"
Dennis: "He probably was trying to impress the Russian judge."

"Richardson contests the ruck.... without much conviction. Well, he may be the best player on their list........ well, certainly Matthew thinks he's the best player on their list at the moment...... mind you, that's a bit like being the best Centre Half Forward in Czechoslovakia....."

"Almost a touch of synchronised swimming about that mark..... minus the peg..."

"Ball in dispute, Lamb, now Yze the meat in the sandwich. Really Lamb should be in the sandwich."

"If it was a set play, they copied it from a Portugese bus time-table"

"Great stuff by Caracella - moments before McIntosh had treated him like a rent-a- car".

Peace.

A quick commentary...

2009-05-22T18:46:00.010+10:00

So a lot of people aren't really interested in special features, they're happy enough to watch the film and move on, which I can understand. When you read, few people even bother to read the authors bio, let alone do any independent research about the topic or whatever, so it's fair enough to just enjoy the film for what it is. But I love special features, in fact I feel ripped off a bit if there aren't any. In particular, I love Directors Commentaries.
Very few people watch as many directors commentaries as I do. I watch Directors Commentaries more than I watch regular films, to me it's far more interesting, and sometimes better than the actual film.
So here's my top directors commentaries. They're not in any particular order, they're just a few nice commentary tracks that jumped to mind. Some are informative, some are funny as hell, and some are both. But they're all worthwhile, so if you happen to own these bad boys then crack them out and give it a shot. I can say with almost certainty you'll enjoy most of them.

This is Spinal Tap

This is probably my fave commentary amongst them all, 'cos it features David St. Hubbins (Michael McKean) Nigel Tufnel (Christopher Guest)and Derek Smalls (Harry Shearer) riffing for an hour and a half, completely in character, and it's almost funnier than the film itself. Almost.
Notable classic lines:
Nigel: Do you still have that castle David?
David: No, I eventually had to sell it. The buyer demolished it and used the stones for a roadway cul de sac.
Derek: A roadway called De Sack?
Classic.

Cannibal, the Musical

I wouldn't recommend this film to anyone, it's OK, but there's much better fare from the boys behind South Park. But it's worth it if you're 15 years old or reeeaaallly drunk. Or baked. Obviously.
However (again you need to be reeeeaaaaaaallly drunk. Or baked.) the DVD commentary actually improves this film, mainly because the participants are themselves, reeeeaaaalllly drunk. And probably baked.
Funny stuff.

Spaced

Admittedly, you do need the 3 disc special edition to get these commentaries, but if you get a chance to watch Spaced with the commentary, go for the US commentaries. With mad guest spots like Quentin Tarantino, Kevin Smith and Patton Oswalt, they're well worth putting your ear to, because the only person who can outnerd Simon Pegg on film references is Quentin Tarantino, so you can almost hear the nerd bar being raised throughout the commentary. Plus, they're all pretty funny dudes.

Any Robert Rodriguez Film

All of Rodriguez' films have ace commentaries, full of info about the filmaking process and the cast. I would highly recommend listening to the El Mariachi commentary, to learn how to make a film for under $10,000, or From Dusk till Dawn, which is Rodriguez and Tarantino together. Killer gear.

Ross Noble

Ross Noble can talk for hours and hours about nothing. DVD commentaries were invented for people like him. If you ever get bored with the show, just listen to the commentaries for more non-sequiter crazyness. Just don't fall asleep with the commentary on, as you'll wake up to Ross ranting about angry badgers and automatic Hassidic Jews, and you won't know if you're still asleep or awake.

The Late Show

I could watch the Late Show forever, but I love the commentary that comes with this bad boy as well. Clearly put together by Tony Martin (who has definately seen more Directors Commentaries than I have) this is 6 1/2 hours of the full cast reminiscing and talking shit about the horrible 90's fashion. Well worth it.

Jackass

Any of the commentaries for the Jackass (or indeed, any of the the spin-offs Viva La Bam, Wildboyz etc.) movies and TV shows are worth a listen, but the cast commentary on the first movie is probably the best. Self deprecation all round, and every line from Preston Lacy is gold, pure gold.
Notable funny lines:
Bam: Damn dude, look how fucking fat Phil is.
Preston: He's a medium build.

Well, there's my humble suggestions for the best DVD commentaries, so give them a shot.
You just might learn something, but probably not. At least most of them are good for a laugh.
Peace

Back Once Again....

2009-05-19T13:08:00.012+10:00

Yes indeed, Optus finally hooked up my internets, so i'm back with a vengeance.

A kindly gentleman by the name of Mike works on my new apartments insanely old phone connection.

For those new to the blog, there's nothing too revelatory happening over here, i'm just venting on the issues of the day, or attempting to bring obscure gems to light, or just airing my opinion.
Here's a picture book introduction to acheaptrim, as well as the stuff i've been into over the past few weeks.

I like music.

Props to the B-Double and his dad Raymond for the artistical shots of our CDs. Drab, i'mma get at you about getting some stacks on the wall.

I also like movies. Everything from

To

And of course your more artistic fare,

or

My favourite TV shows are

and

and of course

and my favourite book is pretty much anything by

A prize of indeterminate value will go to whoever can tell me who is pictured above.
Peace out for now kids,
Broke.

R.I.P Gramps....

2009-05-15T14:19:00.005+10:00

Charles "Bud" Tingwell
03/01/1923 - 15/05/2009

I can't really do justice to the life of this man, so what i'm going to do is link to his own biography and his Wikipedia page, so y'all can read for yourself about this icon of Australian acting.

Among his massively varied career, Bud did everything from Shakespeare to Thunderbirds. His IMDB page lists 146 seperate television and film acting credits, as well as scores of production and writing credits.
By comparison, Christopher Walken (who has acted in at least 3 films or TV shows per year for the last 35 years) only racks up just over 100 credits.
He will be sorely missed. Much respect

IMDB
Wikipedia
Official Website

2009-04-14T21:53:00.002+10:00

Hey kids,
I gotta put the blog on pause for a hot second, the computer's getting packed up while i move out to the East Side, but i'll be back soon! Hopefully before this time next month, shouldn't be more than a few weeks.
Keep checking back periodically, as i'll try to post if I get a chance, but if not i'll see y'all on the flip side.
If you're jonesing for some tasty blog action, i'd recommend:
North of the river
The Meaning Of Dope
The Essential Elements
Here's todays minimix from the Empire, featuring beats from around the world.
Enjoy,
Broke.

This ain't funny, so don't you dare laugh....

2009-04-08T19:31:00.003+10:00

It's just another case of the Eclectical Empire minimix collection.
This one's comedy based, just a few of my favourite pieces with some sweet instrumentals to back them up.
Enjoy kids.
Grab that mofo right HERE

5 Albums I forgot I owned

2009-04-03T18:27:00.009+11:00

So I sometimes forget that I own albums, they get lost in the rotation of my Iriver or I purchase them at the same time as another album which gets more spins, so I forget about some great music that's in my collection. But I just reloaded my whole Iriver with new stuff, and so I ran through my CD's to make sure I didn't miss anything, and came across some gold that I had totally forgot about.
Here's a bit of info on these dope pieces, and then there's a D/L of a selection of tracks from each album for you sampling pleasure.
Enjoy kids!

1. Bombay The Hard Way: Guns, Cars And Sitars
This sweet mash-upesque album features the music of Indian composers Anandji and Kalyanji, who composed and conducted music for the "Brownsploitation" films from 60s and '70s Bollywood.
Every track on this record sounds as though it's straight out of a 70's blaxploitation flick, but with an Indian twist to it like a jammin' sitar lick instead of wah-wah guitar.
This funky joint is the work of Dan The Automator, (Dr. Octagon, Handsome Boy Modeling School) with additional beats credit going to Josh Davis, better know as (say it with me now....) DJ Shadow. Some tracks play to the hip-hop influences of the producers, with the boom and the bap emphasized and laid out over sitar loops, flute solos and heavy string and moog accompaniment. Other tunes on the record hold truer to their original forms, with emphasis on composition and instrumentation.
Super funky, and well worth hunting out.

2. Oh No - Exodus into Unheard Rhythms

Exodus is a production project based on the catalog of Galt MacDermot (most famously known for being the man behind the musical Hair). Eothen Alapatt (Stones Throw General Manager) is the connection between Oh No and the man behind the music from Hair. Dating back to his college radio show at Vanderbilt University, Eothen has made a habit of digging up long-forgotten music legends, and he continues to do so at Stones Throw.
Galt's work has proved familiar sampling ground for Stones Throw's artists since Eothen's arrival at the label. But while the original connection isn't his, Oh No's sheer enthusiasm is the catalyst behind this record.
The original idea was to have Oh No make a couple tracks based on Galt's work. He came back with a couple dozen, and the result was a dope ass album with tight beats and great rhymes from a laundry list of M.C's.

3. Ahmad - Self Titled

An excellent lyricist with a smooth voice and great flow, Ahmad (who was only 18 when he made his debut album) delivers an upbeat, laid-back album with classic 90's beats. I can listen to this album any time, but it's super cool for a warm evening on the porch with a few cold ones. Back in The Day remains a stone cold Hip Hop classic, even 15 years after its release.

4. Ivens - Sounds To Expire To

Melbourne’s Awakenings crew has never made conformist hip-hop. In fact there releases are about as far from the stereotypical Triple J Aussie sound as you can get, and this album is no different.
Ivens has been working hard behind the scenes in Melbourne for some time now. A founding member of the Awakenings crew, he locked himself away for twelve months with production whizkid Plutonic Lab, and Sounds To Expire To is the result.
Each and every time Plutonic Lab steps into a studio he (IMO) excels himself. on Sounds to Expire to, he has orchestrated some bizarre futuristic movie soundtrack, haunting and melodic while also dark and moody. A lot like the first two Aesop Rock albums, with Blockheads minimalist style but a less grimey flavour.
Ivens lyrics are very Aesop-esque as well, with some crazy imagery and clever word play making repeat listens a must.

5. Lewis Parker - Masquerades and Silhoutettes
Lewis Parker is seen as the cream of the crop when it comes to a lot of things. Producer-MC's, British Producers, Sample Based Producers, he pretty much reigns supreme over all these catalogues, and this is (mainly) because of this album. Super short (only 8 tracks) but super dope, it pretty much put Britain on the Hip Hop map, as noone could discount this album as a classic. Atmospheric beats and strangly imaginative lyrics make this an album that will stay on high rotation from now on for me.
Well worth hunting out, if anyone ever sees it on Vinyl buy it immediately and i'll buy it off you the same day.
Well, enjoy the sampler kids, remember to support the artists.
Peace

5 Albums I Forgot About Sampler Download

Damn it feels good to be a Gangsta.....

2009-04-02T23:17:00.002+11:00

You know that those German stores stay selling that cheap ass candy.

The Japanese are Coming!

2009-04-02T22:38:00.005+11:00

And they've brought their giant fire breathing robot baby with them!!

***NOTE: This giant fire breathing baby is actually the work of sweet ass sculptor Kenji Yanobe. Pics courtesy of Pink Tentacle
Please don't attack any Japanese Exchange students over this, there's a 99% chance that this baby was made as a sculpture, and not for world domination.
But keep an eye out nonetheless.
Peace

Up from the 36 Chambers....

2009-03-31T19:47:00.004+11:00

This is possibly even better than the fake Foreigner drummer.
From Afrojacks.com, a typical day at the Wu Tang Office .

Nothing else to add, this is funny enough by itself.
Peace

News Wrap Up

2009-03-29T15:39:00.004+11:00

So here's my favourite news story from this week.
Man steals car, claims to be Foreigner Drummer.

I don't think i've come across a funnier news story than this in quite some time.
A homeless dude convinced a woman and a valet that he was the ex-drummer for the band Foreigner, he then proceeded to "borrow" this womans car, and crashed it soon after, before being taken into custody.
Would you claim to be this man?

There's a few genius bits in this article. Firstly, if you were going to claim to be a celebrity, why choose the ex-drummer for Foreigner? It does have kitsch value, but most people would be unimpressed by this claim to fame, plus, foreigner has had a lot of drummers. I'm pretty sure everyone over the age of 40 has been the drummer for Foreigner at one point or another.
Secondly, and this is what really pumps this article to legendary status, is the fact that the guy said his name was Cory James.
Foreigner has never had a drummer named Cory James.
So it seems that this guy had the idea to fake out a woman and steal her car, but couldn't think of one name of an ex-Foreigner drummer, so he just made one up. And it worked! Imagine that conversation...
"Hi, i'm Cory James".
"Hi Cory, what is it you do?"
"I use to be the Drummer for Foreigner"
"Oh wow, a celebrity! Hey bartender, this guy's Cory James"
"Who's Cory James?"
"The drummer for Foreigner"
"Oh..... sweet."
"So, can I borrow your corvette?"
"Yeah sure, I trust the ex-drummer for Foreigner not to steal my car".

Genius.

Strictly for my 'Nilla's...

2009-03-25T22:16:00.003+11:00

Here's the 90's Minimix from the last Eclectical Empire show.
BTW, if you're wondering what the hell the title of this post means, since i'm a white boy the word N***a is obviously out of bounds for me, so it's been replaced by the word 'Nilla (short for Vanilla).
I'm trying to bring this replacement word into the everyday lexicon, so use it, love it, and get everyone saying it.
Let's band together Nilla's, we've been stepped on for too long!
Peace

Grab your 90's goodness right HERE.

The hunt continues....

2009-03-24T18:48:00.002+11:00

Hey kids,
the posts might be a little light on for the next little while, i'm mad busy looking for a new crib. I'll try to post at least once a week, but no promises.
But fret not y'all, The Trim shall continue to grow to internet domination status, I just need a little while to get shit together.
In the meantime, check Drab Art for some dope new work, and dig through the archives for stuff to keep you interested 'till i'm back on a regular posting schedule.
Peace,
Broke

I'm getting me a flying car!

2009-03-21T21:27:00.001+11:00

'nuff said.

If I get locked up tonight.... (Updated)

2009-03-19T15:06:00.005+11:00

Then it's been good to know y'all.
Leaked Australian government secret ACMA internet censorship blacklist.
I've made my feelings on this bullshit known. If you missed it, here it is

***Update***
OK, So it's now in question whether this is the actual ACMA blacklist (See HERE for the relevent article) however i'm more inclined to believe wikileaks than Comm's Minister Stephen Conroy (AKA the guy who's running this BS) as to the validity of this info. Even if it's not the actual blacklist itself, it definately came from a government source, and after a quick gander at the pages listed on it, it seems to be the type of gear that would get hit by this filter.
The interesting thing, as mentioned by a few news outlets today, is that there appears to be some sites that are totally undeserving of being listed. To wit, about half of the sites on the list are not related to child porn at all, and include a slew of online poker sites, YouTube links, regular gay and straight porn sites, Wikipedia entries, euthanasia sites, websites of fringe religions such as satanic sites, fetish sites, Christian sites, the website of a tour operator and even a Queensland dentist.

***Update part 2***
The links been re-upped, however if you're still iffy about peeping this gear,
here's a secondary link which is apparently safer.
Secure Wikileaks internet censorship article
Peace

Shark Watch! a.k.a Take a chunk out your body like a shark bit a 'nilla....

2009-03-15T23:07:00.006+11:00

This is a new section on The Trim, possibly a one off, as I doubt this type of awesome action will be happening very often.
Sharkwatch involves rad moments with sharks, the most hard body fish in the ocean.
And this week....
MAN WRESTLES 12FT SHARK FOR 2 HOURS TO SAVE MATE.
No BS, this dude went toe to fin with a 12 foot tiger shark for 2 hours to save his buddy from an untimely death. You think you're hard? Craig Clasen is G'd up from the feet up.
I can't do much better than select a few choice quotes from the article.

"Down in my core I really felt the shark was there to feed. I didn't want it to come to that."
"Once I shot it in the gills I felt a moral obligation to finish the job."
"Tiger sharks have no problem eating whole sea turtles, 150lb tuna and even dolphins"
And my personal favourite....
"I shot it six times in the head with a spear and I wasn't having much luck"

Before the animal rights activists jump onto this, it was completely a defensive kill, and I would never support someone going in on a shark for no reason. Except if a shark showed up at the movies. Then i'm fuckin' that shark up.

Kaufman you are not, my friend.

2009-03-15T19:06:00.007+11:00

So the Joaquin Phoenix debate took another turn today, with Mr. Phoenix nearly physically attacking a fan at his latest "rap" gig.
But let's take a second to step back from the whole thing and look logically at the situation.
For the uninitiated, about 6 months ago Joaquin announced he was quitting acting to become a rap star, and less-famous-than-his-brother Casey Affleck would be documenting the whole thing. He performed a series of disasterous gigs, repeatedly garbling his way through songs and occasionally falling off stage.

Now after about 3 weeks of this type of shit, people started questioning whether he was for real, or whether this whole thing was one big prank, in the style of Andy Kaufman, or more recently Sascha Baron Cohen.
Add to this a disasterous appearance on Letterman, and everyone was asking the same questions, to wit "Is he high, is he crazy or is he kidding?"

I was skeptical from the start, but this Letterman appearance confirmed it for me, for a few reasons.
Watch Joaquin carefully, many would assume by his attitude and demeanor that he was high, or losing his mind. Not true. Having spent an inexorable amount of time around people in various stages of drug dependance, I can tell you his behaviour is way too calculated for someone on drugs. He is purposefully trying to give off the air of someone nervous and ill-at-ease, but a few minor slips prove his mind is in place. Specifically, when Paul laughs at him, he jumps on the opportunity to push the focus off him onto Paul, and his line "are you serious, with the maniacal laugh?" sounds too controlled, like he's milking the audience for the laugh, not really the actions of an an insane or drug affected mind.
His constant looking down at his fingernails is obviously an affectation, you can see he forgets to do it on occasion, then remembers he's meant to be acting high and goes back to picking at his nails and avoiding eye contact.
Lastly, when Dave is introducing the clip, Joaquins whole act falls when he says "OK, you're doing fine..." This is too coherant a statement for someone who's losing their mind, or exceptionally high. Suddenly, all his behaviour makes no sense. He is flailing wildly between the actions of someone truly fucked up on PCP or crack (acting like he doesn't understand simple questions, ignoring Dave etc.) to someone totally sober (milking the audience for sympathy when Dave disses his music, cracking jokes etc.) It's all too strange for a truly collapsing mind.
Believe it or not, those of us who's minds are falling apart actually behave a lot more predictably than this. Either we're coherant, or we're not. We're either avoiding human contact, or we're doing everything possible to have all attention on us. Joaquin is swinging between these two extremes like a pendulum, showing that he is a lot more in control of his behavior than he would like us to believe.
His ridiculous act was pushed a little further today, with a near-physical altercation at his latest gig, of course caught on camera by Casey.
Joaquin Phoenix attacks crowd member at latest gig
Again, this doesn't seem to be the actions of someone who is out of control. It seems to be the actions of someone who wants to appear crazy, and it would have been very interesting to see what would have happened if security didn't step in. I wonder if things would really have escalated, or whether you would have backed out.

At the end of the day, none of this is really that important, and i'm kind of playing into Phoenix's web by even posting on it. If everyone ignored this behaviour, i'll guarantee the dude would get bored with this charade pretty quick and go back to making (mostly) decent movies.
But it frustrates me to have people saying he is pulling a Kaufman-esque prank. This self-indulgent BS is nowhere near the genius of Andy Kaufman. Joaquin could never come up with pure comedic gold like this.

Andy Kaufman performs Mighty Mouse - watch more funny videos

And Joaquin, here's how you truly fuck with an audience. I have a feeling that you planted the homie you attacked in your audience, just like Kaufman had Jerry Lawler in on the act here.

The main problem with Joaquins act is that he admits that he has someone filming it. Unlike Kaufman, who was a comedy star in his own right and used the air time he gained from that to fuck with people, you have someone apparently filming a documentary about your decline into psychosis. What kind of a friend would stand back and film a man losing his mind and destroying his career? Even Steve-O's mates got to a point where it wasn't funny any more, and they knew their buddy was in trouble, so they slammed him into rehab against his will.
I'm not saying Casey Affleck is the sharpest knife in the drawer, but if this isn't an act, he's a pretty callous dude to let you ruin your career, and possibly your mind, just for a documentary.
Peace out y'all.

Allow me to reintroduce myself... (Re-Upped)

2009-03-14T00:11:00.010+11:00

My name is Broke.
This is why.

These are my films, documentaries and TV Shows.

These are my Music DVDs.

This is my music, and music making equipment (Some CD's belonging to the B-Double).

I've been collecting for nigh on 10 years now, and it's my second biggest addiction.
Like i've said before, I don't play.

The Face of Evil

2009-03-13T21:56:00.000+11:00

OK, things have been kind of negative over the past few days here on the Trim, but this needs to be broken down for you simple motherfuckers.
The man pictured above is Bernie Madoff. Today Bernie admitted to perpetuating the largest investor fraud ever committed by a single person, pleading guilty to charges that he had defrauded his investors of almost $65 billion.
$65 Billion. Once again, $65 Billion.
Here's how he did it.
Bernie ran a Wall Street firm called Bernard L. Madoff Investment Securities LLC, which at last check was worth well over $100 billion in liquid assets. This firm has an Assets Management division, responsible for taking peoples money and investing it, then paying dividends on those investments. Who's money was he taking? Try Stephen Spielberg, Elie Wiesal, possibly 50 Cent and definately Sterling Equities (the investment vehicle of the Wilpon family, which owns the New York Mets baseball team) among 4,800 others. That should tell you that the average investor can't just up and decide to give their cash to Madoff, you have to be in the know to get in on the deal. And rightly so, since Bernie's inverstors had been enjoying returns ranging from 15% to 22% for the past 30 years. Surely this is a safe bet, well known firm, big name investors, The Securities and Exchange Commission even gave Madoff's company a clean bill of health in early 2000, there could be no problem here. Right?
Wrong.

The problem was, there was no need for Madoff's company to show how and where these returns were coming from. The way they described their investments was to say "The "New York people" have a system whereby they place a series of instant trades — at once with futures, currencies and stocks — and out of this magic recipe fell a tiny 1% guaranteed, no-risk profit for the group. You do that 20 times a year, take away management fees and, voilà, a steady 15% return" (lifted from Time Magazine, minor changes). Madoff was supposed to have some "black box" model that signaled when to buy and when to sell, making Madoff's investments apparently a sure thing.
In other words, we take your money, buy stocks, wait until those stocks rise by 1% (which when you're buying stocks by the millions happens almost instantly), sell them again and there you have it, a 1% gain. Do this 15 or 20 times a year, and you're golden. No risk 15% returns for all.
Sounds too good to be true. And it was.
What was actually happening was the worlds simplest investment fraud, even more basic than your average Pyramid Selling scheme.
Maddoff was running a Ponzi, a massive, unbelievably stupid Ponzi scheme with no way out, except total and complete bankrupcy for all involved.
A Ponzi scheme is an investment scam that pays returns to investors from their own money or money paid by subsequent investors rather than from any actual profit earned.
To break that down even simpler, lets say I give you $1000 to invest, and you say i'll get a 10% return on that. Then the homie BigDubbs from NOTR (shouts and respect) wants to get in on that good action, so he gives you a G-stack too, and you say the same thing to him.
Now instead of investing that scrilla, you hold the dough and when it comes time to pay our dividends, you use my cash to pay Dubbs his $100 dividend, and use his cash to pay mine.
As you can see, noones actually made any profit, and eventually this bad boy's gonna collapse in on itself. Which is exactly what happened to Madoff and his crew. They used new investors money to pay off massive dividends (we're taking in the millions) to older investors, and they just kept digging themselves deeper and deeper into a financial quagmire.
As it turns out, Madoffs investors hadn't even invested any cash for years. They were just paying people off with other peoples money, until one day about 3 months ago, Madoff just admitted it. He actually told his sons that the Assets Management arm of his company was "one big lie". Remarkably, or possibly in one of the most forsighted moves ever, his sons told the feds. The next day, Madoff went down. Hard.
And the stock market went to shit quick smart, as people realised that their money suddenly wasn't there any more. Their money which only existed in abstentia, now didn't even exist there. It was all gone. All of it.

The amazing thing is, well, actually there's a lot of amazing things about this. The first amazing thing is that this got to be this size without anyone questioning how a company can steadily pay up to 15% dividends, year after year. Hello, SEC...? Isn't it your job to make sure this type of shit doesn't happen?
Secondly, if it wasn't for a $7 billion dividend payment that they couldn't make, then this fraud would have continued until god knows when.
Thirdly, Officials at the Financial Industry Regulatory Authority told The Post that after examining more than 40 years' worth of financial records from Madoff's now-defunct broker dealer, there are no signs that Bernard L. Madoff Investment Securities ever traded shares on behalf of the investment-advisory business at the center of the scandal.
Once again, it's possible that THIS MULTI BILLION DOLLAR SHARE-TRADING COMPANY MAY HAVE NEVER EVER TRADED WITH ANYONE.

So there it is kids, hopefully you now understand a little more about how Bernie Madoff ripped off Charities, schools, banks, NFP organisations, not to mention the thousands of individual investors who have now lost everything.
I promise to make the posts a little lighter over the nesxt few weeks, noone likes to focus on the negatives of life, but I think it's important that people understand this junk, as it might one day make you think twice if someone offers you money for nothing.
Because believe me when I say, there is no money for nothing in this life.
Unless you grow weed.
Peace.

I Inhaled so much smoke........

2009-03-12T21:33:00.000+11:00

So last nights post got most of the frustration out of my system, it feels good to go in hard on an easy target like Vanilla Ice. To lighten the mood a little, and in celebration of my week of sobriety, I thought i'd post a video or two of some inappropriately high people.
These come to us courtesy of my man B-Double (Pushing buttons like Shadow in the 90's).
First up, the stoned firefighter.

Following that, the stoned reporter (Soldiers as big as Wales.....)

Next up, the cop who stole weed, then called 911 when he chucked a Whitey with his wife.

And finally, the man responsible for transporting more weed than anyone else (When he was finally caught, it was for attempting to bring in 2 Tonnes of weed to Britain)
Howard Marks, A.K.A. Mr. Nice

I'm a little messed up on cold and flu medication at the moment, detoxing from weed and drink has played merry hell with my...... immune system was what I wanted to write here, took me 5 minutes to think of the word.

Yeah, I really can't think straight. I need to go to bed.

Peace out y'all.

You can Ice my nuts you corporate whore....

2009-03-11T22:52:00.001+11:00

OK, let me say first off, if Vanilla Ice was legitimately apologising for destroying white people's credibility in Hip Hop (until Em came through and made everyone forget about all that shit), I would salute the guy. Really, I would. I would stand and salute the man if he was really admitting that his music is/was trash, and that he was just in it for a pay check, and that his ghost still haunts white boy rappers to this day, and also that he got hung over a balcony by Suge Knight over "contract issues" (If you haven't heard this story, peep hiphop.sh for the full breakdown. This is the only decent thing Suge has ever done, by the way).
If he was really copping to all that, and genuinely sorry for his corporate whore-dom over the past 20 years, and was trying to gain some credibility back for himself, then i'd finally have some respect for the dude. Some respect.
But if one heads to rightmusicwrongs.com, the first thing you're hit with is a Virgin Mobile advert. Continue a little further, and it takes only a few quick glances at the opening page to realise that THIS WHOLE THING IS JUST ANOTHER MONEY SPINNER.
The Ice Baby isn't sorry for a god-damn thing. In fact, i'll guarantee he's happy as a pig in shit that people still care enough about him to bother getting him to apologise for anything.
This whiny prick will literally do anything to grab the limelight for another few minutes. Literally anything.
Let's consider this for a minute. Vanilla Ice is willing to apologise for his whole career, to a public that doesn't really care any more, just to get a cheque. He literally admits that his whole career is shitful, just to score more money. If he really believed that the world would be better off if he wasn't making music and hogging the limelight, HE'D DO US ALL A FAVOUR AND HAVE A BUCKSHOT SANDWICH RIGHT THIS SECOND.
That's right, I said it. Eat a fucking shotgun you industry prick, i'm tired of these 80's has-beens making a "Comeback", playing on people's love of Kitsch-ness (That's the perfect phrase for this instance, since Kitsch has a dictionary definition of "art that is considered an inferior, tasteless copy of an extant style of art") and thinking that they are in any way still relevant or important.
That's enough for now, i've been detoxing for the past 5 days so i'm a little on edge, but you get my point. Fuck this punk and anyone who feels that his music was anything other than filler for the radio.
BTW, my favourite part of this whole thing is that he apologises for "the scandals and the gangs". Dude, get it through your head, noone thinks you're hard, you can tote a pump-action in front of a drop top caddy all you like, YOU'RE NOT A GANGSTER. Noone even classifies "Ice Ice Baby" as a rap song. It's pop, through and through.
Peace party people, sorry for the vitreole, but I needed to vent. Here's some real Hip Hop to get the bad taste out of your mouth.

I took a blues break.....

2009-03-11T00:04:00.000+11:00

....and I Broke it.
Here's minimix 5, i've lost one of these somewhere along the way, and i'll try and re-up it if I can work out which one is missing.
Grab a handful of funk right HERE
Peace,
Broke A.K.A. Baroke Obama.
P.S. This is the 50th post here at the Trim. Happy half-century to all, and cheers to everyone who have stopped in to peep my random musings along the way. I mostly do this for me, as it keeps me busy and relatively sober, but to paraphrase Jigga...
"I do this for my culture,
to let 'em know what a white boy writes like
when the keyboard's out the holster".
Peace

5 Minutes to Midnight.....

2009-03-10T11:32:00.000+11:00

Who watches the Watchmen?
I do, that's who.
Fuck the critics, they're always looking for reasons to hate a movie so they don't look like Stans, fuck the punks claiming that no film could do justice to the comic, Watchmen is the best comic book movie of the decade, possibly of all time.
Unlike The Dark Knight, which (let's face it kids) was essentially boosted to cult status by Heath Ledgers performance (BTW, if you haven't seen I'm Not There, the Bob Dylan bio-pic, get it out for 2 reasons. A: It's a killer film with great cinematography and an all round classic cast, but more importantly B: Heath Ledger uses almost the same accent he uses when he's playing The Joker, so if you close your eyes and listen you get a weird feeling that The Joker is a washed up musician arguing with his estranged wife. It's hella funny.)
Anyway, unlike TDK, Watchmen has phenomenal performances from pretty much every cast member, ass kicking action, epic scope with the story switching almost randomly through time periods and planets (Dr. Manhattan's glass palace on Mars is an amazing sequence) and the greatest anti-hero ever, Rorscharch.
It's worth the ticket price just to see Rorscharch tell a prison full of murderers and rapists "None of you seem to understand, I'm not locked in here with you... you're locked in here with me."
I know I sound like a nerdy Watchmen Stan, I don't really care. If you don't go see this film, it's your loss. And a big loss it will be.
Peace.

Hey Mr. Carter..

2009-03-08T22:28:00.000+11:00

Tell me where have you been?
Even after all the bullshit, Wayne's still a charismatic motherfucker.

And who knew Weezy played Scrabble....

Witness the Slackness...

2009-03-08T21:21:00.000+11:00

Man, my bad people. It's been a while since my last post, been trying to detox and sort out a bunch of shit in my life, so blogging has been a secondary concern for the last little while.
Anyways, here's the catch-up.

This week on The Empire we'll be rocking out with the worlds best lyricists. There's no way we can hit upon every great lyricist in the measy hour we have, but we'll try to cover most genres, and we'll at leat hit the main contenders for greatness.
Speaking of our sweet radio gig, here's part III of the minimix's. This bad boy's pretty rough, as I had major technical issues and had to re-record this about an hour before going to air, but it's still listenable.
Grab that mofo right HERE.

In case you're not as huge a fan of The Daily Show as I am, you probably missed Jon Stewart's epic rant against Rick Santelli and CNBC, so here it is. Gawker also posted this a few days ago, but it's well worth re-posting.

The Daily Show With Jon StewartM - Th 11p / 10c

CNBC Gives Financial Advice

Daily Show Full Episodes
Important Things With Demetri Martin

Political Humor
Joke of the Day

Thirdly, it seems the rest of the world is catching up with myself and BigDubbs (northoftheriver.wordpress.com) and proclaiming The Wire as the greatest thing on television since Wildboyz. OK, most wouldn't compare the two, but I will, 'cos that's how I roll. So if you're not up on it yet, crawl out from under your rock and get busy downloading or buying or whatever, just watch it. I'm sick of explaining the brilliance of this show to slack jawed idiots who can't understand how TV can be revolutionary.

Fourthly, my brother in arms PMM is a busy man, being that he actually studies and has a job and all that, so i'm pretty much holding the fort by myself (damn, two military analogies in one sentence, gotta expand my vocabulary). The point being, if anyone cares to join me here in cyberspace and feels that they could bring something to The Trim, then get at me and i'll add you to the Admin. No need to be exceptionally verbose, judging by the majority of my posts as long as you're semi-literate you'll fit right in.

Fifthly (OK, i'm gonna stop that now, they don't really work after thirdly) I love a good birdman rally. Nothing better than idiots hurling themselves off a pier with a pair of cardboard wings attached. And the shonkier the costume, the better. If it's too well constructed, then the fun is taken out of it. Noone watches a Daytona 500 to see cars driving really fast in a circle, they want to see massive stacks. And the same goes for a Birdman Rally, more failure, more enjoyment. Here's some highlights, courtesy of The Age website.
Birdman Rally Photo Gallery

And finally, I should weigh in on the Chris Brown/Rihanna debacle. I should, but I can't really do better than the homeboy here.

Well, i'll be back soonish, probably.
Peace.

There is no death.......

2009-02-26T00:07:00.000+11:00

So today is the anniversary of the death of Bill Hicks. It's been 15 years since the great man died, and I thought i'd spend a little time expounding on the reasons he is important, and why the world would be a better place if more people thought like Bill.

I got into Bill Hicks the same way most 15 year olds do, having a mate lend me a CD and being told that "this guys swears a whole lot, and talks about fucking". And for the first little while, that's all I really knew about him. I knew he was funny, but it was more of a knee-jerk reaction to the crudity of the pieces and the incessant swearing than an appreciation of the ironies and satirical nature of Bill's comedy.
And let's be honest, Bill was the king of crude humour.

Having sid that, the "crude humour" tag follows Bill incessently, but if one really breaks down his act there isn't that much crudity in it. A lot of swearing, yes, definitely a LOT of swearing, but the base, graphic "Dick Jokes" are kept to his famous Goat Boy routine, and of course, graphically descriptive discussions of pornography. Apart from that, his act was much more about using shocking images to create a scene, or as a juxtaposistion within the joke.

Once I had grown up a little, and had started to hear Hicks' routines for what they were, I noticed how much you heard Bill's words and thoughts echoed in everyday life, even years after his death. Most political stand up loses its punch as the politicians change and retire, but Bills work stands strong, because it isn't about particular politicans, it's about the concepts of freedom and democracy. 15 years ago Bill denounced George Bush (the first) for "selling unstable nations weaponry, and then running on a platform of "The world is still a very dangerous place". These very sentiments were echoed in countless protests against the Iraq war early in the new millenium. In fact, pretty much all of Bills pieces on the Gulf war can be updated for our times, by replacing "Gulf War" with "Operation: Iraqi Freedom".

His discussions of JFK, and how the wool has been pulled over our collective eyes is not so much about JFK, or even the events surrounding his death, it is about how people seem happy to accept the simple answer, no matter how ridiculous and impossible it is, rather than the more uncomfortable truth about life. JFK and his unfortunate death is simply the most memorable and poignant example of what Bill saw as an endemic problem with the American people. They didn't want the truth, they wanted a simple lie, and more Gladiators on TV.
And that idea really lies at the core of Bills political work. Bill saw that the problem with America was not the corrupt politicans, it was the citizens who let corruption run rampant without a word. It was every person who closed their eyes, rather than ask questions. Bill wanted to slap everyone on earth in the face with a massive dose of reality, and scream "Remember this!? Remember reality?!? This is what's important! Not taxes and schools, not gays in the military, but the fact that we now fear the people we chose to lead us!!" He didn't have an issue with politics, or democracy, or even with any particular politician. When he said that he believed that "GW Bush is the son of Satan", what he meant was.... well, no actually, Bill did really believe Bush was evil. Turns out he was right on that one.

But political satire was only part of Bills genius. His thoughts and observations on drugs and their role in our evolution and society are incredibly acute. I can't sum up Bills thoughts any better than he can, so I will merely quote:
“They lie about marijuana. Tell you pot-smoking makes you unmotivated. Lie! When you're high, you can do everything you normally do, just as well. You just realize that it's not worth the fucking effort. There is a difference.”

“Today a young man on acid realised that all matter is just energy condensed to a slow vibration, that we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively, there is no such thing as death, life is only a dream and we are the imagination of ourselves. Here's Tom with the weather”

"Three weeks ago two of my friends and I went to a ranch in Fredericksburg, Texas, and took what Terence McKenna calls a "heroic dose" of Magic Mushrooms. Five dried grams. Let me tell you, our third eye was squeegeed quite cleanly. Wow! And I'm glad they're against the law, 'cause you know what happened when I took 'em? I laid in a field of green grass for four hours, going "My God, I love everything." The heavens parted, God looked down and rained gifts of forgiveness onto my being, healing me on every level, psychically, physically, emotionally. And I realized our true nature is spirit, not body, that we are eternal beings, and God's love is unconditional 'n' there's nothing we can ever do to change that. It is only our illusion that we are separate from God, or that we are alone. In fact the reality is we are one with God and He loves us. Now, if that isn't a hazard to this country... Do you see my point? How are we gonna keep building nuclear weapons, you know what I mean? What's gonna happen to the arms industry when we realize we're all one. It's gonna fuck up the economy! The economy that's fake anyway! Which would be a real bummer. You know. You can see why the government's cracking down."

These quotes alone, which are only a handful from hours of material, show a man who was not out to get fucked up, but to really experience life on all levels, and hopefully discover profound truths about himself and the world in the process. Yes, for many years Bill was an alcoholic and a coke addict, but those negatives fed off each other, and eventually, "I woke up one day and thought, I can keep paying people for things that will slowly kill me, or I can laugh my ass off with my friends by ingesting a natuarally occuring substance". And with that, he walked away from 15 years of alcoholism and drug abuse, and never touched another hard drug or drop of alcohol again. "Don't take drugs, but I have no problem with them. I think it's a personal choice". Many would do well to heed this advice.

Material like this (obviously) did not work well for television, and Bills last recorded piece for The Late Show was pulled due to censorship issues, and has only this year been resurrected and aired. To go into the whole story here would be too long, suffice it to say Dave pulled Hicks' stand up minutes before it was to air, with many speculating it was due to Hicks' pro-life material upsetting advertisers. I highly recommend taking the time to watch the full interview with Bills mother, as it serves well to contextualise the type of man Bill was, and how important his artistic integrity was to him.

Part I
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kUbB_D-dYp8

Part II
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5yTVDoSRKq0

Part III
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VBC1dKGO2_A

There was an anger inside Bill as well. He could turn in a moment from a man pleading for unity and oneness amongst the human race to a raging demon of hatred. A massive, whirling hurricane of obscenity and vitreolic anger. There is nothing like seeing Bill go head to head with a drunk crowd member, as evidenced in Bill vs. Female Heckler.

His anger was truly righteous (adjective: arising from an outraged sense of justice or morality), in every sense of the word. He was furious that people would have the gall to interrupt an artist at work. He was furious that morons walked the earth, never having to answer for their actions. But most of all, he was furious that people didn't get the message.
And at the end of the day, that was it. He really wanted people to hear what he was saying. Not in a self-satisfied, moralistic way, but in a truly humanistic way. Bill didn't want people to listen to stroke his ego, he wanted them to listen because he was trying to help. Just like Jesus, and Gandhi, and Mother Theresa, and every other great person to walk the earth for too few years, Bill was trying to help. He was trying to get people free, to get them out from under, no matter how uncomfortable the trip might be. Bill, in his own strange way, was trying to free us from the Matrix of our own lives, and make us see the real world.
"The Message" was his red pill.
And even now, 15 years later, the message is right on point.

Rest in peace, a great man who is still sorely missed.

And the winner is.....

2009-02-24T00:23:00.001+11:00

PLUS

EQUALS

Rest In Peace.

Puking is involuntary... mostly.

2009-02-21T00:11:00.000+11:00

Well well well, once again a city council oversteps the line and gets pulled back from the brink of actually doing something somebody cares about.
In case you missed the scoop, the City of Port Phillip were going to run some ads on TV about draining the lizard or revisiting lunch on the sidewalk.
Now, this may sound pretty innocuous, and it is. Really. I mean, if you watch the ad, you can kind of see how someone may feel a little voyeouristic watching a girl drop strides in the middle of a party...

My favourite bit is when someone hands her a drink from off camera. It's such a casual gesture. Presonally, I don't have a problem with this piece of advertising, I actually find it quite effective, if not arousing in a weird way.
But my real beef is with the following companion piece....

And my issue is this. A chunder is (90% of the time) unintentional. It's an involuntary discharge of the stomach's contents through the mouth. And sometimes the nose.
I can understand telling people to wait until they get home or at least into their front garden to take a quick slash, but if I need to puke I can't really put that on hold for 15 minutes while I grab a cab back to my place. And noone is letting me into a bar with the line "i'm just dashing in for a quick vomit, then i'll be right out again". The gutter is usually my only choice, and I should be applauded for choosing the gutter (or a handy garbage bin) as my receptacle of choice. I could just as easily have puked on the bottom of the escalators at Parliament station, so it got spread all the way up to the top, and stunk up the place all day.
I'll bet then the gutter doesn't look so bad.
Peace.

Scratchin' for the Oldies....

2009-02-19T22:56:00.000+11:00

So here's the minimix from Tuesday's show, I realised after i'd recorded it that apart from the Big L blend, it's pretty much all Classic Rock.
Hence the title of this post.
CLick right HERE to get your goodies.
Enjoy kiddies,
Broke.

Celebrity Update.....

2009-02-18T15:10:00.000+11:00

Yes indeed, the celebs have been going wild this week, so I thought i'd give y'all a quick update on the happenings, so if you run into some airhead who actually cares about the comings and goings of vapid, self-serving, inarticulate wankers, you'll have something to talk about.

So, firstly.... the MJ auction.
A wild bunch of crazy shit from Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch is up for sale come April this year.
More than 2,000 items are going on sale, let's take a look at some of the wilder stuff.

How about a golf cart, complete with airbrushed picture of Jacko as Pater Pan on the hood... Ballin'.

A sweet royal protrait of the King, i'd like to get a portrait like this of myself done.

For some reason, MJ had a pair of the prop hands Johnny Depp wore in Edward Scissorhands. Sweet gift for a gothic friends birthday.

Man, how I want these gates.

See the full breakdown of items for sale Here

Secondly,
Travis the TV Chimpanzee attacks owner
This article is loaded with gold, just jam packed full of crunchy nuggets of comedy.
Example:
"He could eat at the table, drink wine from a stemmed glass, use the toilet, and dress and bathe himself."
Good start....
"Herold, whose daughter died several years ago in a car accident, fed the chimp steak, lobster, ice cream and Italian food."
Getting there.....
"Police said that Travis was agitated earlier Monday and that Herold had given him the anti-anxiety drug Xanax in some tea."
There is it.
And finally,
Steven Seagal to star in reality cop show
You couldn't make this stuff up. I can't wait for this one, if only to see Seagal's receedinhg hairline. It'll be pure gold!

And to close it out... the new Simpsons HD intro. For those that missed it, the Simpsons updated their intro for HD TV... oinly a few minor changes, but it definately reflects the changes in the show over the past 20 years.

Peace,
Broke

It's been a while...

2009-02-14T15:25:00.000+11:00

But i'm back from the coast, and I have 2 announcements.
Firstly,
HAPY BIRTHDAY PMM.
Yes indeed, another year older, and marginally wiser.
Cheers bud, hope you live to be as old as this guy here.

Secondly,
HAPPY VALENTINES DAY KIDS.
No real happy sentiments to add here, as I don't know who will be reading this, so i'll just include a photo of 2 gorillas hugging.
Enjoy.

I'll be back soonish, need to put together next weeks radio show.
Peace

On the 2 turntables I would say i'm nice....

2009-02-10T16:25:00.000+11:00

Hey Kids,
so for those that tuned in to the show today, or even for those who didn't, here's the minimix from the end of the show today.
Hope y'all enjoyed it, tune in next week for more of the same. Only better.
Minimix 1
Peace,
Broke

Call up the Request Line. ..

2009-02-09T15:54:00.000+11:00

So,
Eclectical Empire starts tomorrow, and it's going to be sweeeeeeet.
Jackson's been digging up facts and figures for the show...

And i've been getting the beats in order.....

So remember kids...

When: 2pm - 3pm
Where: SYN FM, 90.7 on your FM dial.
Why: Because we wanna.....

Heavy Rotation Part V

2009-02-08T17:30:00.001+11:00

Back once again......
So the track for this week comes from the Prometheus of Hip Hop, Aesop Rock.
If you don't know Aesop Rock, he's pretty much the bastard spawn of Bob Dylan, John Milton & Biggie Smalls (Now there's a vivid image...)
But yeah, he is good. Crazy stream of consciousness multi-syllable rhymes good.
Night Life is taken from the Daylight EP, the follow up release to Labor Days (if you don't own it, go out and buy it. Don't download it though, you slack bitches. Spend some moolah, the governments about to drop us nearly a whole stack, so spend the 20 spot on a dope CD). The track itself is a lyrical reworking of a single from Labor Days called Daylight.
Unlike a standard remix, Night Life takes the lyrical structure of Daylight, and by reworking the words pretty much completely changes the meaning and feeling of the track. Where Daylight is positive, Night Life is negative. Where Daylight is uplifting, Nightlight is.... well, you get the point.
There is good reason for this though. During the making of this EP, Aesop went insane. Not the kooky, wild, "my mom is just so craaazy" kind of insane, the real kind of insane. And it shows through on these lyrics. Observe the change from Daylight (Still relatively sane)
And I'm sleeping now, yeah the settlers laugh;
You won't be laughing when your covered wagons crash.
You won't be laughing when the buzzards drag your brothers flags to rags,
You won't be laughing when your front lawn is spangled with epitaphs,
You won't be laughing.
to Night Life (total Nut Bar)
And I can't sleep now, Yeah, the police'll laugh,
You won't be laughing when your covered wagons crash.
You won't be laughing when you're hosted by the ghost of Christmas past,
You won't be laughing when your blow up doll's got a headache
and won't give up the ass,
You won't be laughing.
So as we can see, losing your mind is no joke. Even the chorus of the track goes from mad positive:
All I ever wanted was to pick apart the day,
put the pieces back together my way.
All I ever wanted was to pick apart the day,
put the pieces back together my way.
To scary. Just plain scary.
All I ever wanted was to pick apart the day,
Swallow up the pieces,
Spit 'em at your species.
Reachin' the city of lost barnacles and leeches,
Night-light got me when the daylight went to evening.
Yeah.
But Aesop got better, and returned from the abyss to the edge of sanity where he built a cottage, which allows him to write crazy epic poems without wanting to die. And the world, and Hip Hop is better off for it.
So here's both tracks, for your consideration and comparison.
Daylight
and
Night Light
Peace, Kiddies

WSHH ethers CNN, ABC, MSNBC et.al.

2009-02-08T12:04:00.000+11:00

OK, so the backstory is this...
Jordan Towers decides to hold a rap smoke-a-thon www.smokeathon.com, and all the weed heads come out of the woodwork to stake their claim.

Of course B-Real steps up hard, and issues the challenge.

Shifta checks in from Jamaica, and reps for the real heads.

And then Mistah F.A.B steps in for the West, smoking mad weed and calling his boys at the grow house.
Now, this was posted in the afternoon of February 6th, note Mistah F.A.B smoking up hard, as well as his crew getting super blazed.

Cut to 12 hours later, and Mistah F.A.B has clearly smoked up for a few more hours with the crew, probably sipped a little liquor too, and has subsequently been in a car accident.
And WSHH is straight back on the scene, with the first video.

So, we have WSHH essentially helping to cause a car accident, and then they're back into it with the survival video.

I love this shit.

Burn hotter than the heat that's made by Sun...

2009-02-07T18:10:00.000+11:00

It's hotter than Faye Dunaway in Bonnie and Clyde right now....

Just ask my man....

Keep cool kiddies....

'cos no one likes spontaneously combusting, especially in a polyester shirt.
~Peace

Psyence Fiction

2009-02-06T17:48:00.000+11:00

The world it turning into a hollywood action movie. Seriously. I've noticed it more and more over the past few years, but it's reaching its tipping point, and I want everyone to be acclimatised to it before the earth goes totally crazy, and we go into a crazy survivalist dark age.
So prepare yourself for the future.
Firstly, on March 5th, NASA's Kepler telescope will set out to find the first Earth-like planets in the habitable zones around various stars, which will significantly tighten up our estimates of the distribution of alien worlds - and possible life - in our galaxy. Hell yeah, once this bad boy starts sending back images pretty soon we'll have a Big Brother type show on Channel 10, ABOUT ALIEN PLANETS (cue creepy Theramin music).
Well, probably not, but you get my point, it's pretty futuristic and sci-fi.
OK, not futuristical enough for you, how about an octopus walking like people. That's right, an octopus waltzing around on 2 legs.
http://www.doubleviking.com/videos/page0.html/an-octopus-walks-on-two-legs-11009.html
See, the animals are coming for us man. Bil Bailey was right. Take heed before you're getting into work one morning and it's "hello, Mr. Wasp!"
This octopus is thinking "If I can get my hands on a wig, some glasses and an overcoat I can definately land myself a job, work my way up into middle management, have a team of people working under me, maybe up to 5 or 6, and then after I conquer the office block, i'll take over the world!"
Well, maybe not, but again, pretty futuristic.

OK, I sense some of you are still not on board with this, so how about...
Armed robber turns into Goat, Goat subsequently arrested and locked up awaiting trial by a jury of farmyard animals.
No, I made up the farmyard jury bit, but the rest it true.
See.....
Nigerian police detain goat over armed robbery
Now, the headline is funny enough, the story is even better, but the topper to this whole story is the quote from the police officer.
"We cannot confirm the story, but the goat is in our custody. We cannot base our information on something mystical. It is something that has to be proved scientifically, that a human being turned into a goat".
This is so good, I won't even taint it with pointing out how funny the line "It is something that has to be proved scientifically, that a human being turned into a goat" is. I won't harp on about how insanely funny that is. And oh god, is it funny. Stupidly funny. I think what makes this story even funnier is the repeated use of the word Goat. It's a funny word.....
OK, back to the actual point of this post, how the world it becoming a Blockbuster movie, and reality is slipping further away from us.
I'll nail home this post with just one final bit of trivia for the naysayers.
In Tokyo, Japan, Bruce Willis was named honorary chief of the cyber-terrorism task force by the National Public Safety Commission on June 12, 2007.
That's right. Bruce Willis, an action movie star, is the honorary chief of the cyber-terrorism task force for Japan.
*Brushes dirt off shoulder, leaves room with a pimp strut*

Oh, and in case anyone wanna test me,
22

~Peace

I don't sleep, 'cos sleep is the cousin of Death

2009-02-04T19:35:00.000+11:00

If y'all don't know Cory Gunz, then lift your game, fix your face, and prepare for the future.
Sure, you can say there are more articulate rappers out there, yes there are more intelligent rappers out there, yes there are more political rappers out there.....
BUT NOONE HAS FLOW LIKE CORY.
NOONE.
NO. ONE.
Not even Weezy. And to prove it, here's 3 videos.

A Milli Re-Versed

Invasion Radio

Heartless Re-Versed

If you don't believe Cory is the future after this, I don't really care, because when the rest of the world is catching up to me i'll be light years ahead, probably listening to some Czechoslovakian vintage funk.
Or i'll just have this on loop.

Peace

Moment of Silence.....

2009-02-04T16:33:00.001+11:00

Yeah, so I thought i'd put out an R.I.P for my man The Hon. Peter Howson CMG.
Unless you're an ardent follower of Australian Politics (as i'm sure you all are, I assume all the visitors to this page are part of the intellectual alumni) you probably don't know who Peter is, but you should.
He was a great politician, he served in the Royal Naval Volunteer Reserve as a pilot from 1940 to 1946, got shot down, and rocked a serious Joker style scar on his face from a run in with some shrapnel in WWII.
He was the Liberal Party member for Fawkner from 1955 election until its abolition in 1969. He was then appointed Minister for Air in June 1964.
None of that is the really important stuff, I just thought i'd add a little background.
In 1967, Harold Holt's government was attacked over allegations that it had misused the VIP aircraft fleet for ministers' private purposes (Hell yeah, you bet they were joyriding in the Ministerial jet, taking it down to Tijuana for a long weekend, Ghostriding the plane down the tarmac...). When asked to table records on the fleet's movements, Holt and Howson refused and implied that they did not exist (What records...?), but Senator John Gorton (snitchin' MF) later found that the records did exist and tabled them in the Senate (isn't that exactly the plot of an Arrested Development episode? If only Peter and Harold could have had T-Bone burn down the storage locker that contained the records, they would have been fine).
So after that blew over, Peter was appointed Minister for the Environment, Aborigines and the Arts in March 1971 and was thus Australia's first minister for the environment (Much better than the sub-par Peter Garrett).
He was also Australia's first minister for Aboriginal Affairs, and has remained passionately involved with Aboriginal rights and reconciliation for the past 30 years, with many published articles and discussions to his credit. Bennelong Society president Gary Johns is quoted as saying Mr Howson was tireless in trying to help Aboriginal people.
"I think his greatest achievement was to persist in the knowledge that Aboriginal people were to become part of Australian society, [He] persisted in the view when it was not fashionable."

So yeah, R.I.P. Peter was a great guy who did more with his life than most of us could do with two, served under 4 PM's, kicked it with who knows how many presidents and dignitaries, and he rocked a sweet 'do in the 50's.

And if none of that impresses you, he had a voice like Gandalf the Grey. Seriously. If he was standing on the Bridge of Khazad-dûm and said "You cannot pass!", ain't no Balrogs getting round that.

Further required reading:
Academia's sorry obsession
A Rabbit Proof Fence full of holes
Live not by land alone

Too good not to pass on...

2009-02-03T23:21:00.000+11:00

So yeah, I promise i'll be back in the next few days to boost my posts, it's been a long few days, but i'll be back with a vengeance like Rambo, First Blood part II.
But here's some gold to tide y'all over.

Peace

Gumby... the guy rocks.

2009-02-03T14:49:00.000+11:00

Gumby is the bomb. A mean green man with crazy, absurdist philosophies to share with the kids.

Look at him here, rocking out on a wicked telecaster, sharing a confident's gaze with his ever present pony pal pokey. They can walk into any book. Any fucking book. They can saunter into the juicy bits of Lady Chatterly. They can hang out with Fanny in the Magic Far-Away Tree. They can give Harry Potter a sweet wedgie. I'm not the only nerd to have thought of this.

Best thing about Gumby is that his claymation vignettes, of which there are over 230, desseminate some way-out concepts for their target market of toddlers.

Within Gumby's psycadelic entourage are Pokey, an orange rocking horse; Prickle, a spiny yellow dinosaur or dragon; Gumby's family, being Gumba, Gumbo and Minga (his sister); Goo, an amorphous blue blob sometimes resembling a mermaid who fires globule granades at the ever present enemy: the rigid, unbending blockheads.

Honest, go back and look at some of the Gumbies made in the 60s. Its so arty that the guy who invented is actually called Art. Art Clokey. The characters Prickle and Goo are representations of the philosophies of Allan Watts, in their names, physical appearance and temperament.

One episode from the early 60s ends with Prickle suddenly exploding, covering Gumby and Co with his viscous remains. Gumby's advice to his beleagured fellows? "Oh well everybody. That's just the way life is."

There were no warnings for Prickle. Like being swept off the road by a drunk-driver, or falling to your death due to shoddy scaffolding, sometimes you just explode.

Still don't believe me? Check out this episode.

Bloodshot eyes on the sparrow.....

2009-01-30T01:50:00.000+11:00

So i'm reading New Scientist (Yes, I read New Scientist), and I come across one of those crazy sentences that makes you proud to be a part of the human race.
OK, we fight a lot over stupid insecurities, and we're probably destroying the planet, and a lot of the issues of the world could be sorted out if everyone went "OK, in past some crazy bullshit went down, everyone got hurt in a variety of different ways, I acknowledge that and respect it, it sucked, but we start afresh right.... now". I know all that, and it frustrates me no end.
But no other animal that we are aware of could do something like putting into orbit "four telescopes - equipped with the world's largest digital cameras, at 1.4 billion pixels apiece - that will search the skies for anything that blinks or moves. Their main purpose is to look out for potentially hazardous asteroids bound for Earth, but inhabitants of the outer solar system will not escape its all-seeing eyes.
Their main purpose is to look out for potentially hazardous asteroids bound for Earth.
Bring it on, universe. Humans are hard bodied and hoodied up.

This is where I stop being a fan of Kanye West...

2009-01-29T16:21:00.000+11:00

Sorry homie, I tried to like 808's, I tried to ignore your growing obnoxiousness, but you really need serious psychiatric help, and at least a year off touring.
BTW... It's hotter than 2 mice fucking in a wool sock right now.

Chilling on the couch with Letterman....

2009-01-28T22:35:00.000+11:00

I've been trying to tell my buddies for years why David Letterman is and always will be the king of Late Night Television. A lot of people watch, and just see an old guy trotting out bad monologues and shilling for blockbuster releases and bands on tour. But you need to put the guy in context. Firstly, he's coming up on 20,000 shows, nearly 30 years of television, hundred of thousands of guests, and he works 6 nights a week at nearly 62 years of age . That's crazy in its own right.
Secondly, The Late show is so corporate now, that as such it has lost what was great about it. Back in the 80's, the Late Show was Dave's show. If he wanted to cut an interview short because the guests sucked, he would. If he wanted to spend a whole show calling businesses that had the word "Fun" in their name and asking employees how fun it was to work there, he would. The guy who works in the Korean Deli across the street became part of the show because Dave got bored and sent a cameraman out for sandwiches. Genius, and hilarious.
But the best part of Letterman is when he has no interest or respect for his guests. These are the moments of Letterman brilliance, and are far greater than any scripted comedy could be.
Jacked from Cracked.com, here are the 9 most awkward Letterman appearances of all time.
Watching Letterman ask Paul "...have you ever watched a man drown before?" is worth it in itself.
http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-9-most-hilariously-awkward-letterman-interviews/
Peace,
Broke

I got 5 on Snoop's Source Award....

2009-01-27T22:45:00.000+11:00

So Death Row has been auctioned off for a cool $24 milli to Global Music Group. President of GMG Susan Berg just made a killing, and probably isn't really aware of it.
The purchase puts her in control of all the recordings ever released on the label, including groundbreaking albums from the likes of Tupac Shakur (All Eyez On Me, 9x Platinum and counting...) Snoop Dogg (Doggystyle 4x Platinum, Tha Doggfather 2x Platinum) and Dr. Dre (The Chronic 3x Platinum). Berg now also owns the rights to twenty unreleased 'Pac tracks which could quite possibly (definately will) be brought together and released as an album.

Hold up, let's backtrack a little bit. She just bought the rights to All Eyez On Me, Doggystyle and the Chronic, as well as who knows how many other artists and albums, for $24 million?
God damn, now that's a crate digger.

Suge Knight sold the label after a judge ordered him to sell off all his assets to the highest bidder after a bankruptcy situation. The situation stemmed from an incident back in 2005 when Suge Knight was forced to pay a staggering $107 million to ex-partner Lydia Harris who claimed that he had kept her profits before being removed from the label. The payout led Knight to file for federal bankruptcy in 2006.
So that's all interesting enough, but the real gold is in the details.
Along with the company itself, the assets of the company were sold off too. All of them. Everything from the TV's, to the furniture, to SNOOP DOGG AND DR. DRE'S SOURCE AWARDS. Now there's a sweet paperweight. Imagine your crew rolls round, "hey bro, what's that award up there?" "oh, nothing important, just Dre's Source award for Best Producer".
Peep these photos of stuff that was sold off, courtesy of deathrowauctions.com

Anyone for N.W.A's platinum record plaque?

The Infamous P.I.G picture, which Suge Knight commissioned during the height of the East Coast/West Coast beef.

Now this has to be the weirdest item. "The Liberator" wedge, great new angles on Sex!
Why was this just hanging around, still in package, at the Death Row offices? Pretty expensive wedge too, $280. Damn.

I could rock Suge's hat, no doubt.

Along with this sweet booty, lucky punters made off with:

~ The Death Row Records Electric Chair ($12,000, if you're wondering)
~ Suge Knight's Cigars & Engraved Cases
~ Numerous Tupac Shakur collectable items
~ 300,000 Saleable CD's in Original Packaging (some CD's were selling for as little as 4c apiece)
SO what's the lesson here? Don't screw your business partners out of their earnings, because they will crush your company and take all your money. BUt the ensuing auction will be a bonanza. Here's hoping that the new owners don't try to squeeze every last drop of cash out of Pac's memory like Suge did.
Peace,
Broke.

Filters are for Spliffs you government bitches....

2009-01-26T21:30:00.001+11:00

So I dunno why this hasn't been getting more press, but sooner than you think Senator Stephen Conroy, the Communications Minister, will supervise the test phase of a filtered internet feed throughout Australia. Late last year he announced it (on his blog, no less) and it quickly fell out of the press, probably because this type of thing is debated pretty much constantly. Any day now, some of Australia's internet service providers will join in a pilot of the minister's "undesirable content" filter.
This filter will block content blacklisted by the Australian Communications and Media Authority. Once again, This filter will block content blacklisted by the Australian Communications and Media Authority.
No discussion, no input from the populace, and an independently nominated authority making decisions on what constitutes content offensive enough to be blacklisted. The blacklist will apparently block access to child pornography, no argument there, good work all round. However, in theory there is nothing that could stop the ACMA blocking anything the government authority doesn't fancy.
Last November, Conroy is quoted as saying the blacklist would filter child-porn sites as well as "other unwanted content". Yeah, that's where the issue comes in. Right there. You inadvertently summed it up well, Senator Conroy. The authority's list is totally secret, and you have been quoted as saying that this filter will block "other unwanted content".
Define that, if you could, because that sounds a little like well crafted Doublespeak to me. I have a feeling that the "other unwanted content" may in fact be "other content that is unwanted by the current government".
Again, I want to stress that I can understand parents wanting to keep their kids safe, and I can understand the need to keep the dreaded child porn off as many screens as possible, but its difficult to believe that Conroy has a complete grasp of the magnitude of what he is doing.
I quote the man himself...."If people equate freedom of speech with watching child pornography, then the Rudd Labor Government is going to disagree". And the Australian Christian Lobby is right behind it too, says managing director Jim Wallace "The need to prevent access to illegal hard-core material and child pornography must be placed above the industry's desire for unfettered access".

Yeah, guys, you're not really getting it. We're with you on the child porn bit, but a government filter of the internet, which is hailed as the last true bastion of free speech, is a dangerous line to tread. I mean, China's internet technically has the same filter, they're just a little more liberal with the term "other unwanted content".

I'm probably overreacting, but you get the point. You have to watch what's happening. Most people don't really understand the fact that Bush didn't technically have to leave the presidency. He could have stayed on, 'cos in 2008 congress had passed a law which states that as long as the US is in a state of emergency, the president can stay on for as long as he wants. And with the current economic issues, the ongoing issues in Iraq, as well as beef with Iran and North Korea, Bush could easily have declared a state of emergency and hung around. There would have been a civil war, which would have been interesting to say the least.

Anyways, stay vigilant cyber pals, and keep the internet free from filters. In fact, everyone should download some porn tonight, as a fuck you to Senator Conroy. Besides, it's hard to argue with a man who believes that "If you're opposed to the department's cyber-safety plan, you are opposed to the protection of children".
Just for that cheap shot Conroy, here's 40 Glocc with the unrated version of "Finer Things". Definately *NSFW*, definately bumpin'.
Peace.

Video update

2009-01-26T21:17:00.000+11:00

Hey kids, here's a bunch of sweet vids that have kept me amused over the past few weeks.
So waste a few minutes. Go on, you deserve it. You know there's always more minutes coming.

The best of The Late Show - great moments in presidential speeches. Self explanatory, and hilarious.

Welcome to California. BTW, how cute is Trish Regan? I'd watch her report on pretty much anything.
Anyways, with the US in a recession, I think the legalisation movement should grab the moment and push harder for legalisation, as weed sales could stimulate their flagging economy, and the taxes may be enough to pull them out of hardship all together....
Just a thought.

Anyone who knows Rush knows YXZ, but have you seen the drum solo rocked by a 12 year old asian girl?
Killer.

Bo. Fo' Sho'. Still can't decide whether I like this or not. It is clever.

?uestlove vs Travis Barker. 'nuff said.

And finally,

That's right, I said it.
Peace out y'all

One more cup of coffee before I go....

2009-01-25T22:46:00.000+11:00

Straight jacked from Byron Crawford, show respect and click the link on the right of this page, Byron knows whats up before I do.

This is why you don't want to go to gaol. ever.

Peace party people, Ha ha, see you later!

Heavy Rotation Part IV

2009-01-25T22:19:00.000+11:00

So for part IV of heavy rotation, I thought i'd give you guys a treat. Not that the other tracks have been weak, but this is an extra special HR.
DJ Jaguar Skills put together what may be the craziest thing i've heard in quite some time. 800 tracks, played over 48 minutes, in essentially chronological order charting the rise of Hip Hop from one-time fad to the worlds most dominating form of music, language, dress sense etc.
Beginning with the Fatback Band, and their track King Tim III (unbeknownst to most laymen of Hip Hop, this is widely believed to be the first Hip Hop track ever pressed to wax, 2 years before Melle Mel came through with The Message, but that's really another story for another post) you only get 6 seconds of King Tim before we're onto the next one. And then the next one. And then the next one. And so on, through 797 banging tracks. Don't worry if you're not feeling the current selection, as you only have to wait 6 seconds for a new beat.
But seriously, this is an awesome accomplishment, and well worth listening to, as it gives you a great feel for how the sound of hip hop has changed since those days way back when.

For those interested, track list can be found here
Grab that Bad Boy right here
Props to Jaguar Skills, obviously.
Peace.

They call themselves Black, but we'll see if they'll play this.

2009-01-25T22:01:00.000+11:00

Straight back like I left something......

ec⋅lec⋅tic –adjective
1. Selecting or choosing from various sources.
2. Made up of what is selected from different sources.
3. Not following any one system, as of philosophy, medicine, etc., but selecting and using what are considered the best elements of all systems.

So we got the green light from the crew at SYN (mad props) to take the contents of our lives to the airwaves, so keep an ear to the radio over the next few weeks for myself and the Jacksonian Institute dissecting the weeks events, bumping only the freshest beats, and playing silly sound effects as well (Temple Block Riot here we come!).
If 2pm on a Tuesday isn't the best time for you, because you're employed in a job that takes place at daytime during the week, fret not dear friends. I will be uploading all our shows, in all their shambolic glory, right here at acheaptrim for your downloading and listening pleasure.
So, to quote The Hollowmen, "Watch This Space!"

Not so charming...

2009-01-23T08:30:00.001+11:00

Well after that little treatise on Slumdog it seems international opinion has turned and all on the voice of one Tapeshwar Vishwakarma! This top slum=representing beauraucrat is going after the films Music Director A H Rahman and its top India-based actor Anil Kapoor. He claims the films title and continuing reference to slum-dwellers and dogs is a violation of many of india's poorest.

Good on you Mr. Vishwakarma! But how about you go after the script-writer? What do the actors and music directors (??!!?!!?!) have to do with the textual content? There's more money in the Rule Britannia imperialists any way. I'm sure Mr Boyle is flush as a bejewelled loo these days. It is they who have rudly exploited the pain and suffering of literally millions of Indian's. It is they who have distilled years of hardship and toil into a 2.5 hour feel-good rag-to-riches story to paste a cathartic smile on the face of middle-class white folk half a world a way and recieve glowing accolations, gold-plated trinkets and buckets of money in doing so.

How much was that young boy paid to jump in that pile of shit???

That said, good film but.....

Slumdog

2009-01-23T08:08:00.000+11:00

So I went to see OSCAR BUZZ numero uno 'Slumdog Millionaire'. I have to go see a couple, already put down benji button and the other options? revolutionary road? Well, apart for my penchant for leo finding yet another excuse to get his hair wet while he kisses kate winslet, an oscar film about real estate? c'mon. c'mon!

To start with, y'all should check out slumdog. Why?
1. Becuase of the way the host of the Indian Who Wants to be a Millionaire says the word Millionaire. Something like a cross between those folk that make hats and the way the french cook their fillets. Hillarious. That's not racist, its comic.
2. For Danny Boyle's incredible direction and who ever was the DOP's success in capturing that vision. Some of the shots as the young slum kids dash through Mumbai's kilometres of slum are fucking amazing.

That said, I don't wanna talk it up to much, as I had one of those poor experiances of way too high expectations and inevitable dissapointment. Honestly it couldn't have panned out any other way. I was told it was 'The best film I've ever seen' by both a 19 year old bar-girl from brisbane with a killer tan and an interest in OK magazine, and an ageing, heavily tattooed, certifiably insane ex-crim who said 'It made me laugh, it made me angry and it made me want to cry'. If thats not a fair canvassing of the australian population, I'm nor sure what is. So I went in expecting fire-works.

But yeah, check it out. Aint half bad.

Why gremlins is an ingenious screenplay, AKA Chris Columbus , WTF?!

2009-01-21T17:31:00.000+11:00

OK, so i'm watching Gremlins with the crew a week ago, and enjoying reliving my childhood with a nice kids flick from the 80's (coincidentally released the year of my birth), and all is going well. I'm laughing at the 80's power suits, the special effects are sufficiently half-assed, and the haircuts are definately worth the price I paid for the disc ($14.95 for both Gremlins 1 & 2, it would have been a crime not to snatch it up).
As a complete aside, I was IMDBing Gremlins, to get some charector names, and one of the ads has possibly the best lead-off line I have ever read... "Ready for some Piranha action, in 3D?"
Hell yes I am!
So back to Gremlins, around 30 minutes in, Billy and Kate (the romantic teenage leads) are strolling through the city, and it's clear to anyone with even a modicum of screenwriting knowledge that the ensuing scene will be laying some emotional pipe. It will be a fleshing out of the charectors, we will learn where they stand in the world from 3 or 4 lines of dialogue, which is usually all you need from someone anyway, most people are pretty vacuous.
So it becomes clear by the end of this scene that Kate is not a fan of Christmas, in fact quite opposed to it, as highlighted by the line "while most people are opening up presents, some people are opening up a vein."
Wow. Really? in a PG movie? we can say "opening up a vein" in a movie aimed at under 12s? Awesome. Now how about we have Paddington Bear on the cover of his next book sitting in a squat, on a dirty mattress, with one wellington off and his toe on the trigger of a shotgun. Back cover, brains and blood splattered on the filthy wall, with little bits of yellow plastic from his rain hat stuck throughout.
But that isn't even the harshest part of gremlins. This is dead set, no doctoring, straight out of the movie, around 1 hour in.

That's right, Kate hates Christmas because she found her father dead in the chimney, dressed as Santa Claus.
Now, let's just take that in, in all it's disgusting glory. First of all, you have to think of the heartache that was caused by her father not showing up for Christmas. Then there's the weeks of agonising waiting, wondering if he's OK, worndering what happened. And you have to think that there was some point when Kate and her mother must have considered the possiblilty he was having an affair, adding a real sense of abandonment (as well as male trust issues) to the whole thing.
Then, in the middle of all of this, they get the cleaners in to sort out a problem with their chimney, AND FIND THEIR DEAD, DECOMPOSED, STINKY FATHER/HUSBAND DRESSED AS SANTA CLAUS STUCK IN THE CHIMNEY.
Holy crap, that shit is fantastic! Tarantino couldn't have come up with something as gruesome as that. And to have the whole story delivered from a cute teenager playing with a destroyed Christmas tree makes it feel like something out of The Shining.
And then, when it couldn't get any creepier, you have the whole thing rammed home with the capper of "and that's how I found out there was no Santa Claus". Like that is the major issue. Forget you found your father in the chimney, probably had to watch while they got a crane in from the nearest construction site to drag his rotting carcass out of your chimney, maybe it broke after they got it out and your fathers legs went smacking off the roof onto your trampline and bounced around for a while like that bear that gets tranquilised on Youtube, the major issue is definately that that night ruined your childhood illusion of Santa Claus.
And as a last note, how did that ever pass muster with the suits at the studio?
Did not one person say "yeah Steven, love the movie, gremlins are cute, actors are fine, but whats with the dead father in the chimney? That's a little dark there, bud. Is everything OK at home with Chris? No marriage troubles?
Might want to think about a rewrite".
Peace,
Broke

Welcome to the fold....

2009-01-21T17:25:00.001+11:00

So as you can see, my buddy PMM has joined the illustrious alumni here at acheaptrim, and as he has mentioned, i'll be providing the Sparkle and Shine, while he will be providing the hard hitting political opinions and discussions with intellectual heavyweights of the day.
Probably not, but at least the topics of discussion will range further than how sweet the Watchmen movie will (hopefully) be.
So welcome on board bud, and good luck staying afloat in this tangled web.
Again, watch out for those Crack Spiders. Seriously.

I aint no crack spider...

2009-01-21T14:21:00.000+11:00

I don't know much about this here web. Don't expect PMM to be dropping regular photos on the screen, or any of them there moving picture films you kids are so fond of.

However, having been described in the last week alone as 1. The Speaker of Truth; 2. A Vibrant Fillibuster; 3. Really Conceited and 4. Partially Unemployed my much esteemed webmaster DJ Broke has invited my to make the occational contribution to this project.

A Cheap Trim is more than a forum for discussion. Its a chance me to avoid the one constant in DJ Broke's life. Judging by the current content, and safe in the knowledge of Broke's promise of 2% of the first million and .5% there after, I reiterate my ad-space offer to Universal Music Group and Studio. We already give you cats mad press. Pay us.

Its also the sister-site to our soon to be on-air radio show Ecclectical Empire. Coming soon to SYN Fm Melburn City. The show's going to be a solid antidote to the sick naffness of commerical fuelled shit and the increasingly chipper voices of promotion-proud triple J. It's going to have a good blend of music, steeped in hip-hop, protest and lyricism. It's going to have sketch comedy, reviews, analysis and discussion. It will be devoted to Tunes, Taste and Truth. More details soon.

For me personally A Cheap Trim will be a place to share. As I said before, I'm not so good with putting anything right here on the page for you, but I will at the end of every post provide a few links to things of interest.

Issues like climate change, fossil fuels and consumerism have become such a common concern for anyone with any wits that much disillusionment can be found in people struggling to believe that we, as a society can deal with the problems they will ineivtably present. I for one find myself at a loss when I consider the reaction of myself and those around me to the sudden absence of amenitites we so regularly take for granted. This green angst has been helped in no small way the viewing of these films.

1. The earth one.
2. The resources one.
3. The really scary conspiracy theory one.

Recently I have been lucky enough to meet a few people who have put me on to some real options. Gareth Johnstone gave me this one. Check it out.

Peace.

Watch out for the Crack Spiders....

2009-01-19T21:56:00.000+11:00

They'll take you out if you front.

Heavy Rotation Part III

2009-01-19T15:24:00.000+11:00

Lil' Wayne - Best Thing Yet

It was always going to happen. In fact, i'm surprised it didn't happen earlier. In fact, i'm surprised all these Heavy Rotations' haven't been Lil Wayne tracks.
There's not really an awful lot that needs to be said about this track. Off The Empire's "The Drought 6: The Rebirth",this track shows Wayne back at his lyrical best. Still not talking about anything more susbtatial than cars, chicks, and why he's the best ever, but who cares?
Stick it out until the last verse, it's pretty much stream of consciousness rapping. Some wild shit.

Grab that bad boy right here.

Back on my Grizzly...

2009-01-18T18:49:00.000+11:00

.... 'cos i'm a bonafide hustler. Been a bit slack of late, had a long wewk at work and a hectic few days off, but i'll be back tomorrow with a few random thoughts to extrapolate.
Peace,
Broke

Overpriced Popcorn '09

2009-01-07T13:52:00.000+11:00

So '08 was pretty good for movies, The Dark Knight was killer, 300 rocked, Judd Apatow came out with some great comedy, and the gangster movie was reinvigorated with American Gangster.
But '09 looks even sweeter, with some monster comic book adaptations, apparently some new Tarantino, and a bio of one of the greatest rappers ever.
Here's the rundown of the movies i'm most looking forward to this year. I don't guarantee they'll all be for everyone, and they're not necessarily Cannes material, but they will be dope.

NOTORIOUS

Biggie was one of the best to do it, and i'm glad it looks like they made this bio the right way. Jamal Woodard is actually a pretty good rapper, and looks and sounds a hell of a lot like Biggie, and whoever is playing Puff does a damn good job. Hopefully the movie lives up to the trailer.

THE SPIRIT

The Spirit looks dope like Cheech and Chong. You have Samuel L. Jackson, Scarlett Johansson, Jaime King and Eva Mendes all rocking the Frank Miller film noir style. Sweet.

WATCHMEN

Yeah, you know i'm looking forward to this one. If you don't know about Watchmen, you really should get a copy and read it. There's a reason it's the most celebrated Graphic Novel of all time, and i'd highly recommend reading it before seeing the movie, as movies can change the way you read things, and Watchmen wil be way more potent as a book if you don't know the ending.

WOLVERINE

'nuff said, you know it will be sweet.

AVATAR

You can count on James Cameron to come with the heat, and the Times tipped this to be the film of the year, perhaps even Titanic proportions.
Cameron wrote the script himself, and the plot follows a future human invasion of a planet rich in natural resources that is also a biological time-bomb, appropriately known as Pandora.
We follow an ex-marine who changes sides, choosing to defend the ammonia-breathing indigenous creatures on the target planet against his fellow invading Earthlings. The film straddles two of the most important current themes, the fear of environmental catastrophe and an endemic sense of guilt about the destruction of nature.
No trailer as of yet, but the concept art can be seen at avatarmoviezone.com

Well, that about sums it up for the movie releases for this year, there's probably a few that I missed but these would be most of the standouts. Get out and see these bad boys, as there's nothing like a massive screen and banging sound, even if most movie crowds suck these days.
Peace,
~Broke

Heavy Rotation Part II

2009-01-04T22:03:00.000+11:00

Once again, high like a Hi-Top Fade....

But anyway, this week's Heavy Rotation is an undiscovered gem, a sweet funky groove from one of my favourite MC's, Brother Ali. Any festival heads probably caught Atmosphere and Brother Ali at Falls Festival over NYE, an apparently they ripped it down once again (not surprisingly).
This funky little number is a bonus cut from The Truth EP, so most people missed it, making it even more delicious for those who picked up on it (no non-delicious filler around here, only chocolate filled goodness). I'm way into the funky piano at the moment, so Ant is (once again) hitting all the right buttons with the smooth bass and tinkly piano styles on this one, and the Brother comes through again with an impeccable flow, and some heartfelt lyrics. Ali is usually on the positive tip, but he's way into the happy-to-be-alive thing on Good Lord. Not surprising, considering the shit he's been through, he probably is happy to be alive.

But onto the dissection.

Good Lord is an obvious statement of Ali's beliefs, and how they have affected his life. From the opening line of "best believe the Q'uran influenced all of my songs...", Ali makes no bones about where he stands religiously, however my favourite thing about Ali is I never feel like he's preaching, more explaining and celebrating how his religion has influenced him throughout his life. The discussion and religious references continue throughout the first verse, with Ali mantioning the effect that his religion has had on his fans, as well as namechecking numerous prophets and Islamic figures, including Bilal ibn Rabah with a tight couplet:

"Holler like Bilal in the tower,
Hayya 'alal-falah, Allah is the power"
(for those who don't know, Bilal ibn Rabah was the first official muezzin of the Islamic faith, known for his beautiful voice with which he called the people to their prayers. Step your 7th century muezzin game up, y'all.)

Ali then closes the verse out with a typically juxtaposed line,

"Laying in the alley I whisper the Shahada (The Shahada is the Muslim declaration of belief in the oneness of God and acceptance of Muhammad as his prophet),
The bullets fly by from the drive by."

And then a fantasy of what might be called a black paradise, but is really closer to a celebration of pinnacles of black history and culture. Admittedly a bit strange from an Albino guy from Minnesota, but he has addressed the reasons for his Pro-Blackness in many a track, and that's really a discussion for another day.

"Imam Mohammad used to pound on the podium,
Popmaster Fable worked it out on the linoleum.
Chappelle busts funnies, Mos Def busts rhymes,
and Muhammad Ali is the greatest of all time."

It's really in the second verse that Ali gets on the pro-life tip, and I don't mean any anti-abortion talk. This is emo-rap at it's best, or possibly worst. If Ali didn't have swagger like a pirate, this verse would be dangerously close to waaaaay too soft for my liking. I don't need guns and bitches in every verse, but I like a little backbone to whatever i'm hearing.

"Something spiritual happens when the hands get to clapping,
can you tell me what religion do you laugh in?
The human reaction of smiles and cries,
What language are the tears when they're falling from your eyes?"

Again, great lyrics, don't get me wrong, and I think this verse was very deliberately structured to be humanity based, rather than religion based, as there's a real "I am Human, and so are you" vibe about this verse.

"You've probably seen the sun rise hundreds of times.
But let a painter paint it or a poet describe,
the very moment where heaven and earth might collide,
and god let the breath of life come outside.
Satan doubted it, angels bow to it,
I'm so beautifully human and i'm proud of it.
Soul of a soldier, heart of a scholar,
I wrote this poem with the blood of a martyr."

A tight 16 bars, closed out with a callback to the first verse dismount, and the chorus kicks in to take it all home. Flow like Niagara.

All in all, this track will remain heavy in my Iriver for a while, there's better Brother Ali tracks out there, but this jam puts me in a good mood for the day, and it's a banger to throw on when you're headed home from work and need a lift after a shitty day.
Enjoy the track, and be sure to cop as much Brother Ali as you can. Support the artists doing their thing kids, otherwise we'll have to listen to Nickelback all day.

Grab that bad boy RIGHT HERE

Ron Barassi.... Straight Gangsta.

2009-01-02T22:00:00.000+11:00

http://www.realfooty.com.au/articles/2009/01/02/1230681672966.html

Barassi still bringing the ruckus after all these years, top notch effort.
And who punches an old guy? Poor form to those guys.

The '08 Video review

2009-01-01T16:55:00.000+11:00

Well, no better time than New Years Day to review the year that was. This is the internet video highlights of 2008, according to me. It's by no means complete, just a lot of my favourite moments from throughout the year.

Classically Trained Hip Hop

'08 was the year that "musicians" i.e. People trained in playing an instrument other than the turntables (yes, I know about all the great Hip Hop bands out there, i'm talking about musicians from other backgrounds who have never rocked beats before) discovered hip hop. There was a slew of great collaborations between MC's, DJ's and orchestras, as well as an increase in touring artists incorporating featuring live instrumentation in their stage show. The resulting music is off the chain.
My personal favourites are listed below.

Ryan Leslie - Lollipop

Ryan Leslie is a hugely underrated R&B artist, and this little gem was recorded for Green Lantern's Sirius Radio show about a week after Lollipop was released. Ryan learns the chords on the spot, and proceeds to massacre the beat, totally freestyled. Killer work, dude is legit. If Wayne re-released Lollipop with Ryan ripping solo's throughout, i'd listen to it.

Ronald Jenkees

Ronald Jenkees is exactly what he appears to be, a nerdy white boy who made deal with the devil, Robert Johnson style, to be infused with Ray Charles' AND Jam Master Jay's spirits. The results?
Mmm...... yummy.

Jay Z Live at Glastonbury

'Nuff said, really. Doesn't come much hyper.

Viral Video
Viral video was everywhere in '08, hence the name. Youtube became the requisite source for water cooler talk, and I would wager 30% of inter-office emails were nothing at all to do with work, but contained random Youtube clips of bears falling onto trampolines and cats being slammed into walls from ceiling fans. World Star Hip Hop has rightfully claimed the title of "The CNN of Hip Hop", which is quite a strange title, considering KRS-ONE called hip hop itself "CNN for black people", but now any rapper with a camera phone can start beef with anyone (Souljah Boy Vs Ice T, Charles Hamilton etc..), and probably will. I'd like to think that CNN will pick up on WSHH's popularity, and start calling themselves the WSHH of world affairs. Probably not though.
Jacked from ByronCrawford.com, the following is a montage of some of the most memorable moments from the internets last year, and i've included a few gems I think were overlooked.

Indian game show host slapped on live television

This guys gets stomped. Well deserved though.

Best of SNL 2008 Election coverage

There was so much great gear from SNL this election, here's a montage of the best bits. Tina Fey's Sarah Palin was pretty dead on, and funny as hell.

Bachelor Cooking with Aria Giovanni

If you're not up on Bachelor Cooking, it's a cooking show starring porn star Aria Giovanni which is informative and pleasing to the eye. If you've just moved out of home and never cooked for yourself before, I recommend getting onto these lessons so you don't end up surviving on Mi Goreng and frozen pizza.

Eli Porter: Rap legend

Eli porter set the rap world on fire with his razor sharp lyrics. My personal favourite? "Like Rosie O'Donnell at a Bi-sexual bridal shower". What does that mean? Would it be the coup de gras of Bi-sexual bridal showers to have Rosie O'Donnell roll out, dildo's akimbo?
This Video has been dissected and discussed for months, but doesn't lose any potency the more I watch it.

Well, that's it for the time being. I'll be back with a wrap up of Movies and music at some point, as well as a look to the year ahead.
Peace,
~Broke

Ever Alert....

2008-12-30T16:37:00.000+11:00

I'll be back later with a full post, but for now, here's a blast from the past for y'all.
Watch homeboy eat the banana during the intro. He's loving that thing. I don't think i've ever enjoyed a banana (no homo) that much.

Peace,
~Broke

Heavy Rotation Part I

2008-12-29T20:07:00.000+11:00

So this will usually happen on a Sunday night, but my mate Bunners knocked me out with a fat bowl last night, so it's happening today.
This weekly (hopefully) post will be to highlight whatever track has been heavy in the rotation of songs i've been listening too. It won't necesssarily be a track released the previous week; in fact knowing the state of hip hop at the moment it probably won't be from the previous week unless it's a good week for Hip Hop.
It'll just be a track that is good enough to get me to stop listening to Get This for a while, could be from years ago, could be something crazy, could be a rarity.
Or it could be none of these things.

So, part I.

Promoe - Headache
Download

Promoe (Mårten Edh) is a Swedish rapper, and a founding member of Swedish hip hop group the Looptroop. This track has been getting the first play of the morning for quite some time now, and will continue to do so.
Taken from White Man's Burden, it's been a while since i've heard a track that uses interplay between the rapper and the sample so well. Headache uses a decent selection of samples from Julie Driscoll's A Word About Colour, taking the chorus as it's own (as do so many tracks these days), but unlike most chipmunk soul beats released these days, the original inspiration for the beat is brought in throughout the verses themselves, in a variety of different ways.
As highlighted below, the Julie Driscoll track individual lines of A Word about Colour are sometimes brought in to link one bar to the next. Sample is in parentheses:
"My semen's sedated from stress and toxic waste,
my whole being's mutated;(my soul)
don't even mention my soul,
it's been gone for so long...."
A clever and mellifluous way to link the original feel of the sampled piece into the new track, and it is put to better use a little further on when samples are used to rhyme 2 lines, and close out the verse:
"Stumblin around in a state of mass (confusion),
and i see no solution, (confusion)
but to turn up the music to soothe this (pain that i'm feeling).

This continues throughout the track to great effect, increasing the effect of both the beat itself and the potent lyrics. And the lyrics are potent enough without needing to be propped by the beat. Again, keeping with the theme of the original sample, the track is heavily politically motivated, although the lyrics lean more towards highlighting the feelings of inadequacy and helplessness that accompany people who feel left out of the political system about the issues For example,
"We spiral downwards,
inbreeding a bunch of spineless cowards
livin' in an illusion we define as ours.
Nationalism's that kind of prison
we assign all power,
desperately clinging on to it until the final hour..."
As Rex Hunt might say, this is dizzy stuff folks.
Ghostface raps over "Superman Lover", and uses the concept to structure the feeling of his rhyme, but doesn't really play with the original song during his verse at all, and most MC's rhyming over a track with a sample based chorus will use the first line of the chorus to dismount from the verse e.g. Lil' Wayne's "Best Thing Yet":
"And that's because I know the sun will raise again,
And when it do, Im'a praise the Man.
They say "You crazy Wayne!" but I just bake a man,
And thats Ms. Baker saying that i'm the...(Best Thing Yet)"
Nice, but not nearly as impressive as appropriating a whole track into your lyrics.

Well, that's it. Enjoy the track, and as an added bonus, here's the original inspiration for you to compare the two.
Julie Driscoll - A Word About Colour
Now, i'm going to drink Vodka and Cranberry and watch The Wire until I crash out.
Peace,
~Broke

A few Christmas goodies....

2008-12-26T19:19:00.000+11:00

The Star Wars Holiday Special

"The Star Wars Holiday Special was a two-hour television special set in the Star Wars galaxy. It was the first official Star Wars spinoff produced.
In it, Chewbacca and Han Solo visit Kashyyyk, Chewbacca's home world, to celebrate Life Day. Along the way, they are pursued by agents of the Galactic Empire who are searching for rebels on the planet.
The main storyline of the film contains a variety-show segments as well as a cartoon produced by Toronto-based Nelvana that officially introduces the bounty hunter Boba Fett.
The film is notorious for the almost universal hatred it garners from the nerd platoon, or really anyone with any taste. George Lucas had limited involvement with the film's production, and he was understandably unhappy with the outcome."

Cribbed from Wikipedia

This film is shit. But funny as hell after a few drinks, and it's kitch value makes it one of the more bearable Christmas specials.

Click here for the highlights clip

This is 2 hours long, just warning ya.

Biz Markie and Big Daddy Kane - XXXmas Freestyle

Recorded live at Club Uptown, Worcester MA. 1987, this is a classic early Hip Hop routine between 2 of the best to ever pick up the mic. Biz Markie invented the Beatbox (really, he invented it), and spits some tight beats here, but more importantly than the beats themselves is the way he responds to Big Daddy Kane's rhymes, which is the sign of a truly great beatbox. Just like a great drummer, it's about more than creating a metronome beat for an MC to rhyme on, it's about reacting and responding to highlight the flow of the MC. And very few can fuck with Big Daddy Kane on the Move the Crowd tip.

Jason Alexander and the Aristocrats

To close it out, if you haven't seen the Aristocrats yet, get to it ASAP. It's unrated (meaning it's too filthy to get a rating from the OFLC) so be prepared to hear the dirtiest language you've ever heard, but it is hilariously funny. It's worth buying or renting just to hear Kevin Pollack do his famous Christopher Walken impression.
For now, here's Jason Alexander of Seinfeld fame riffing for 5 minutes or so on the infamous Aristocrats joke.

"Never open with that....". Classic.

Sometimes I hate Hip Hop....

2008-12-26T16:39:00.000+11:00

But hey, it's their money.

Christmas wrap up

2008-12-26T14:31:00.000+11:00

Well, the festive season is done for another year, and an interesting question was raised by my buddy Piers, AKA Dancing at the speed of Light (futhermore known as DATSOL). He pointed out the distinct lack of Christmas decorations on the streets and in the stores this year. Think about it, there were no stupid wreaths hanging from lamp posts, no giant red and green baubles that are inevitably smashed by rambunctious youths, the most you got was some tinny christmas carols in Coles (I would love to splice into the Coles music system and play Tornts for a day through every Coles in Melbourne, no food would be bought but 600,000 Melbourne Bitter longnecks would be sold, and a lot of fights would ensue).

As you can see, in my street it might as well be Ramadan for all the decorations that are out.
I even saw a busker in the Bourke street mall 2 days before Christmas WHO WAS NOT WEARING A SANTA HAT. I gave him no candy for his lack of effort.
He could play a mean pan-pipe, but come on homie, the santa hat is what makes it. Totally serious look, full Andes peasant get-up, playing "Så Skimrande Var Aldrig Havet" like Gheorghe Zamfir (step your Pan Flute game up y'all) with a Santa Hat on. Now that's comedy.
But I digress...
Could this lack of christmas cheer be an unexpected cutback made necessary by the massive economic downturn of the past few months? Or is it a bid to acknowledge the growing secular nature of Australia, and attempt to avoid shoving a Christian holiday down the throat of what is quickly becoming a non-christian public?
Or does nobody really care about Christmas any more?
Has it got to the point where even the vendors and local councils of this country are doing that thing your mother does where she makes no effort for Christmas or her birthday, and when someone points it out, she says "Well, noone esle was willing to put in any effort, so I got tired of doing everything" (damn that stings).
If that is the case, that's pretty slack on our part. I can't think of anyone ever who has thanked a local council for putting up decorations, in fact most people complain about them going up too early, if they're even mentioned at all.
Well now you all see what your barberous letters to the local paper have done. We get nothing for the festive season, and it's what we deserve. We made no effort, so why should anyone else. Until people decide to grow a giant plum pudding out the front of their house, or something of equivalent nature, then we should live in holiday exile, with no retail staff dressed up as Santa's elves, and no baubles for the youth to destroy.
So to bring back the Christmas Cheer, here's the Yo Yo Yo Kids, with "presents".
Dance along with the Snowman and reindeer, it's the only time of year you can.

~Broke

And a Happy New Year...

2008-12-25T00:14:00.000+11:00

Merry Christmas y'all.
Now blaze that good shit up!

The Blog Title explained

2008-12-24T20:43:00.000+11:00

OK, even i'll admit that the title of this blog is pretty obscure, so watch this clip, and it'll make a little more sense.

4:32 is about the time that you'll want to pay attention.

~Broke

First Post.... (the post that hurts the most)

2008-12-24T20:31:00.000+11:00

Well kids, here it is. I suppose I should explain this blog, it won't be hard hitting at all (I don't think) , it'll be more like I made my lounge room available to the internet. But if I come home, and there's some amateur porn being filmed on my couch, i'm shutting this bad boy down.
A few boring notes, at the moment i'm the only administrator for this blog, but if anyone wants to join me in posting i'm all for sharing the workload, non-existant as it is. Mostly these posts will revolve around musings on music and movies, or general obscure points of interest that have been playing on my mind. Eventually this will be the forum for the radio show I am in the midst of putting together with my esteemed colleague Jackson, so i'll be uploading any pertinent links here for perusal and discussion. Also, some jammin' beats.
I won't be posting full albums for download here (support the artists you download snakes), i'm not saying i'm not guilty of it myself because I am, but there's enough places for you to get stuff for free on the net, and it doesn't take much effort to type your favourite artist + rapidshare into Google. I will occasionally post a link to a song or two if it's in relation to the post, or if it's a truly slammin' beat.
So with that, as Tobias Funke would say "Let the great experiment BEGIN!"